Confessions of a Teenage Otaku
by QueenOfEpic
Summary: Alexandra is your typical modern otaku. Her life revolves around her favorite anime and manga, but one death wish sends her life spiraling back in time and into the dark and mysterious world of Kuroshitsuji. Be careful what you wish for. Rating for language and mature themes.
1. Prologue

This is my first story on here. I usually only read things but I didn't know how to post stories. Partially because I was too damn lazy to figure it out _ anyway you all should know that what ever manga/anime I use for this fic, I don't own (I wish)

Anyway, here goes nothing

(TO INFINITY AND BEYOND! (sorry too much Toy Story (LOL parenthesis within parenthesis)))

May 28, 2012

Endless hours, countless days, and sleepless nights. I can't get enough of it. When I'm away from it, My mind constantly wanders to it. My world revolves around this one thing.

My parents are always drilling nonsense into my head. They tell me it's useless, that it rots my mind and I shouldn't be wasting my time and my _'precious brains'_ (what are they, zombies?) on such useless matters. I don't care. I never will.

This is the only thing that truly makes me stand out, the only thing that sets me apart from those who only care about the simple things. Other than when they need something from me, the Materials* only converse among themselves. I'm perfectly content with that. But hey, at least I have super powers. I'm invisible.

If I had all the money in the world, I would spend it only on that. I do get income from my parents though, an allowance of $30.00 a month. My parents don't trust me to spend it so they asked my friend Dazha* to watch what I spend it on. Joke's on them, she doesn't care.

She doesn't really share the same interests as me but we are like twins anyway. She always criticizes me for liking it so much but I know/hope she's joking.

My life would be nothing without it. Hi, I'm Alexandra Lunamorte and I am a slave to the Japanese media.

Yours truly,

Epic Otaku

Well, that's all. The next chapter will be way more interesting of course, but the anime/manga characters won't be introduced until much later. Please leave reviews :) Soon I'll draw you guys a picture of Alex and post it.


	2. That Otaku, Endings and Beginnings

Hi guys, its me. PEOPLE PAY ATTENTION CLOSELY because this is the last time I'll say it since I'm a lazy bum like most authors (using Shigure from Fruits Basket as my prime example)

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own any characters besides a few OCs like Alex(andra). I also don't own any anime or manga or songs or books or movies or cats or horses or penguins or dragons or unicorns or demons or angels or gigantic fire breathing dogs mentioned in this fic.**

**Remember to look back to this before you decide to sue me.**

May 31, 2012

I only write in this thing because I have to, my therapist told me. And I kind of enjoy it but don't tell my parents or my over enthusiastic pedo gorilla of a shrink that tidbit of info. They _actually_ gave me a pink, sparkly, and_ fluffy _diary in which to write down all of my delightful thoughts.

Back on subject, my family thinks that my 'obsession' with anime and manga is getting out of control. So what if I made my little sister bow down to me and say "Yes, my lord." a couple of times. I'm only as obsessed with anime as Charlie Sheen is a drug addict. I don't call myself an otaku like others, I just call it being culturally open-minded. But come on, we all know that's a big fat lie.

I stayed up late watching Hetalia _again_ last night. Then I woke up late _again_. I ran into class looking like a hot mess _again_. I got scolded by the teacher _again. _Last but not least, I got _another_ detention. FUCK MY LIFE. The teachers say I have potential but not even my own parents believe that one.

To top it all off, I'm a senior in high school yet, by the boobs, hair, and butt, I look like a prepubescent 9-year old boy. And I'm short. I'm like a less mature looking Haruhi Fujioka. Some say that I have the Lolita thing going on but that's a lie. I'm not cute at all.

To tell the truth, everyone either hates me or is totally creeped out out by me. Either way, I'm like bug spray. With my layer of pretense on, no 'mosquito' will dare to bite me. Nobody knows the real me. Not even _me_, but that's how I protect myself from getting hurt.

I'm so tired of this. I have no real friends and when I do get close to someone they end up running away. Slowly, but surely, my parents and even my sucky therapist are beginning to give up on me. I'm unwanted, unclean, impure (as Angela/ash would say) I'm giving up on myself as well.

======*Magical Scene Change*=====

I guess I have become somewhat attached to this dumb thing. For, even as I'm waiting for the right moment to end my life, I document each movement, each breath, each thought. At least they'll know how I felt until that moment if they even care. I was just a waste of space before. A special child, one that deserves to be on this earth more than I do, will soon take my place.

[A/N: From this point on, this story will become Alex's POV (you'll see why later on) ]

I closed the diary with a sense of nostalgia washing over me.

"Here goes nothing." Tears slid down my face as I silently stepped off of the ledge of the tall building.

Just as I was nearing the ground I was engulfed in pitch black feathers. My diary was suddenly ripped from the tight grip of my scrawny arms as I continued to fall closer and closer.

"I'm afraid the Young Master says you are far too valuable to lose," I heard in my ear.

A pair of strong arms encircled me and the world as I knew it went black.

Thank you to AnimeOutcast001 for giving me the inspiration I needed to write this chapter. Well that's all... :D


	3. That Otaku, Hired

**As I said in the beginning of the last chappie, I will not be posting the disclaimer anymore because I am too lazy. Before anyone decides to sue me look at chapter 2.**

**Here goes the next update...**

* * *

"_Whom is this __**boy, **__Sebastian?"_

"_This is not a boy, My Lord. This is a mysterious girl I discovered lying unconscious in the courtyard." _That voice sounded way older that the first one...

"_Why was she there?"_

"_I'm afraid I do not know."_

I listened intently to their whispered conversation, desperately trying to keep my breathing steady. _Their voices seem _very_ familiar. Where am I?_

"_She is quite a mystery in many ways, Young Master."_

"_How so?"_

"_I believe she-"_

Just as their conversation was becoming interesting I sneezed. It was not a normal sneeze, not at all. By sneeze, I mean a loud blow-your-brains-out-and-pop-a-blood-vessel sneeze. I swear I could almost feel them jump.

"Why, I was wondering how long you were going to _pretend _to be asleep." The older guy said. I think his name was Sebastian. _WAIT, SEBASTIAN? _I opened my eyes and sat up quickly ignoring the intense pain in my chest.

"HOLY HELL!" I yelled when I saw the faces [A/N: LOL I almost typed feces right there XD] of the two people in the room. They were none other than the two people from my all time favorite manga/anime on earth. Sebastian Michaelis and Ciel Phantomhive.

"To my knowledge, there is nothing 'holy' about hell," Ciel said indifferently.

"Miss, you are injured. I advise you to lie back down."

"I don't understand what all the fuss was about." The little son of a- I mean Ciel said.

"Well, if you just saw a demon butler and his sadistic 12 year old master that aren't supposed to exist I'm pretty damn sure you would be having a bitch fit too."I yelled.

"That is not the proper way for a lady to speak." Oh trust me, I got worse.

"How do you know what Sebastian is anyway?" Ciel asked, glaring at me with his head cocked slightly to the side.

I ignored his question and continued rambling on about how this had to be a dream. But then I remembered how I got where I am now.

_=*Flashback*=_

_"Here goes nothing." Tears slid down my face as I silently stepped off of the ledge of the tall building._

_Just as I was nearing the ground I was engulfed in pitch black feathers. My diary was suddenly ripped from the tight grip of my scrawny arms as I continued to fall closer and closer._

_"I'm afraid the Young Master says you are far too valuable to lose," I heard in my ear._

_A pair of strong arms encircled me and the world as I knew it went black._

_=*End of Flashback*=_

I realized that when you die, you don't dream. I must really be here in some kind of weird twisted reality. Although I've been dreaming about something like this happening since forever, but is this really what I want?

"Ehem." The clearing of someone's throat caused me to jerk violently from my sudden epiphany.

"Miss, I just questioned you about where you came from." The black clad butler smiled 'pleasantly'.

"I don't know." I lied, just to be safe.

The demonic servant's eyes swirled a violent magenta for a brief moment. So brief that I _almost_thought I could have imagined it.

"Well," Ciel began, "Since you have no residence at the moment, I believe I have no choice but to accept you as a servant of the Phantomhive manor. From what Sebastian has informed me you will be quite the useful pawn." Pawn? What in the living hell.

"Everything is fine with me as long I don't have to wear a maid's uniform."

"You will have to." Ciel replied.

"No I won't."

"I order you."

"I decline."

A vein popped up on Ciel's forehead, "There was no option there."

"To me there was."

"Wear the bloody uniform!" By now Ciel was shaking with anger/ annoyance.

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes." After that there was a moment of silence making Ciel think he had won.

"No"

"UGH, FINE! HAVE IT YOUR WAY!" He finally gave in to my persuasive charms…

"If you two are done releasing sexual tension, I shall serve the Young Master his afternoon tea."

"NO WAY DUDE! He's like, twelve!" That would be total rape on my part. Although I wouldn't mind...

"Aren't you two the same age?" Sebastian asked.

I sweat dropped, "No I'm Seventeen."

The room fell silent for a moment until I heard:

"Pfft, liar."

"That's it little boy! We are so takin' this outside!" Ciel and I were in the middle of a glaring match, when Sebastian was a brave enough soul (irony) to interrupt.

"That reminds me, because you refuse to wear the maid uniform and you are the same size as our Young Master, you will wear his clothes until we are able to contact a tailor."

"Such a shame. The poor girl can't even fit into Finnian's clothes."

*Ignoring Ciel*

"That is such strange attire you wear."

If only you knew that it could get even weirder.

"Why don't you go to greet the rest of the servants? By the way, what is your name?"

"It's Alexandra. Alexandra Lunamorte. You can just call me Alex."

* * *

Loving how long this chapter is guys. Also loving the reviews, alerts, and favorites. KEEP THEM COMING! If you have any questions for me just ask away.


	4. Picture of Alex

Sorry this isn't an update. I am working on it right now though. I just wanted to tell you guys that I have drawn a picture of what Alexandra Lunamorte looks like. It is on my Deviantart my name is K-Popper.

Here is the link: #/d53i1bb


	5. That Otaku, Meeting The Rest

**I'm so sorry for not updating in a little while *bows* (Excuse Time) It's just that I had a lot of work to do before what with me graduating (8th grade) . I had to say a speech, two poems, and I got two awards (one for reading the most books and one for academic excellence ) THAT IS ALL OVER NOW AND I AM OFFICIALLY A FRESHMAN! Anyway, the disclaimer is in the second chapter. Here is the update.**

I silently followed behind Sebastian as he led me down the dark and somewhat sinister halls of the Phantomhive manor. Although I can tell that these creepy passageways are gonna give me hell (haha see what I did there?) late at night, I couldn't help but feel awed as we walked down the well-furnished corridors. The carpeting was a sort of dark royal blue and soft. The walls were tan or maybe a dark creme with an intriguing pattern. They were adorned with portraits of whom I assumed were Ciel's mom and dad.

"Miss Alexandra, how are you feeling at the moment?"

"Aww, Sebby's worried about me," I gushed.

"I am not worried in the least. I merely do not wish to have another _thing_ to take care of." Guess I'm a thing now...

"Sure, keep telling yourself that." I said smirking.

Sebastian glared at me, his eyes flashing pink for a brief moment.

"AAAAnyway, I'm perfectly fine." I replied sighing. "But, ugh. Stop it with the stupid formalities...Just call me Alex."

"Miss Alex, we have arrived at the kitchen. The other servants should be right through that door. I assume you will be alright here." Sebastian stated.

"Yeah I'll be just peachy." I said. By the time I said that he was already around the corner. I knew he heard anyway.

I gathered my courage and slowly pushed through the large -to me-wooden doors. When I strolled *cough*tripped*cough* through the doors, I was greeted with a pretty normal sight. There were four people who I knew were the servants I was supposed to be meeting. I'll just pretend I don't know them. There was a tough looking blonde guy, probably in his mid-twenties, wearing a chef's uniform with goggles around his neck and a cigarette in his mouth. Next to him was a ditsy looking girl with glasses and awesome magenta hair, wearing the outfit of a maid. Then there was THE MOST ADORABLE LITTL BOY I HAD EVER SEEN with blond hair held by red barrettes and pretty normal clothing. Last but not least there was a little old Japanese man sipping tea dressed similarly to Sebastian. When I walked through the door every eye in the room turned towards me.

"Uh...Hi guys." I said awkwardly.

"Oh, that little boy is the guest Mr. Sebastian told us about, yes he is," the girl with the glasses said. "I'm Mey-Rin, yes I am."

The tall blonde stepped up. "The name's Bardroy. Everyone calls me Bard."

The smaller blonde stepped up as well and waved cutely. "Hello, I'm Finny." He said with a huge smile.

"That is Mr. Tanaka over there." Mey-Rin told me.

"Ho Ho Ho," Is he Santa in disguise or something?

"Hi everyone, I'm Alexandra Lunamorte but you can just call me Alex." I said.

"That's a girly name for a boy," Bard commented.

"Your hair is really long for a boy," Finny said with his head tilted like a puppy.

"Aww, he's awfully cute, yes he is." Mey-Rin said with a face as red as the blood gushing out of her nose.

"I'M NOT A GODDAMN BOY!" I yelled in annoyance.

"Really?" They all asked in perfect unison.

"No, I'm a seventeen year-old GIRL." I said with a vein popping out on my head.

"I still think _she_'s really cute." Mey-Rin said quietly. I sweatdropped. Well, I guess someone's a fan of Yuri.

I cleared my throat and laughed awkwardly, "I can already see were gonna get along well."

**I'm sorry, I really didn't want this chapter to end here. I know where I'm going with this story I just don't know how to get there. If you have any ideas PM me (don't put the idea in a review because that would ruin it for other readers). On the another foot. I tried to teach my older sister (I'm 14, she's 19 or 20...) about Yaoi yesterday. This is how it went:**

***My sister Jennifer sees my new screen-saver of Sebastian an Ciel***

**Jennifer: Is that a boy and a boy?**

**Me: Yep.**

**Jennifer: Are they gay?**

**Me: Not in the show. Fans make pairings with those two together.**

**Jennifer: So then they are gay.**

**Me: It's called Yaoi. **

**Jennifer: ?**

**Me: Yaoi basically means two boys.**

**(by then she was ignoring what I was saying) **

**Jennifer: So I'm Yaoi then? (she's a lesbian)**

**Me: No, You would be Yuri. But Yaoi and Yuri aren't really sexual orientations, it's more of a conce- (sister interrupts me)**

**Jennifer: Tell me, are they together sexually and emotionally? **

**Me: In the show, no. But according to the fans, yes.**

**Jennifer: Then they are Yaoi (pronounces it weirdly).**

**Me: But a person can't simply be Yaoi. I told you, it's more of a conce- **

**Jennifer: *walks out before I get to finish***

**Me: … :/ … -_-**


	6. That Otaku, On Strike

I'm so sorry but I had to do this.

I have learned that is planning to remove all story's over an M rating. So story's that contain Lemons, Limes, rape, yaoi, yuri, extreme violence and song based stories!

So there is a possible chance that my stories could be taken down as well as yours and many others! **WE ****CANNOT**** LET THIS HAPPEN!**

I have learned of this so called **"**_**Black out**_**,"** I have not helped in planning this and have only learned of this today, but I am happy to partake in it! And so should you!

There is a set date!

**JUNE 23! **This is GMT timing so we all do it together.

**ON THAT DAY YOU MUST DO THE FOLLOWING:**

**Do NOT log in!**

**Do NOT update!**

**Do NOT enter the website!**

**Do NOT PM anybody!**

**Do NOT review!**

**DO NOT DO ANYTHING! THIS WEBSITE MUST BE A TABOO FOR THAT DAY! IT IS FORBIDDEN!**

With luck the website will notice the large decrease of visitors and take us seriously! Please listen, participate, and pass this on! Spread the word! We have until Friday which shall be sooner than you think!

Please inform me if you will be joining! I must pass on the information! (To whom I am unsure!)

Fanfiction's motto is "Unleash your imagination." But how is this possible if there are things we CANNOT write? If people do not like something they do not read it! My dream is to one day be an actress, as well as author but if I can't even post **FANFICTION** here how am I supposed to have the courage to even write a real book?

For many people, and me included, writing is an escape from the real world. Even if for a short time, it is where we can truly express ourselves and become a better writer in the process. With writing you create a world that becomes your own, you grow and flourish that world as your story unfolds. Your paper is the canvas and your imagination is your paint.

As a writer you create something completely unique to the world around you and share it with the world for other's to enjoy. We cannot let Fanfiction take away this freedom of creativity that we all came here to share and enjoy with one another. I do not care if you are half way around the world or at the bottom of the ocean. WE CANNOT LET THIS HAPPEN.

**Pass this on! And remember June 23!**

**Unleash your Imagination and fight for it too!**


	7. That Otaku, Tailored

**IMPORTANT NOTICE IN THE ENDING AUTHOR'S NOTE!**

But for now, on with the story.

"Ugh, I'm bored as hell." I sighed to myself as I walked through the seemingly endless corridors of the Phantomhive mansion.

I couldn't bother the shota pirate any more. Earlier that day I had been thrown out of Ciel's study-courtesy of our very own Sebastian Michealis- because I was 'annoying' Ciel. Just because I literally hopped on top of his desk and started dancing to get his attention, doesn't mean I was trying to annoy him on purpose…..Okay, maybe I was but I see no reason to actually _throw_ me out of the room. And when I say throw, I mean Sebastian picked me up like a spoiled piece of meat and tossed me out of the room.

I was so bored and had nothing else to do, so here I am strolling down the halls singing Ke$ha songs.

_Hot and dangerous_

_if you're one of us then roll with us._

'_Cause we make the hipsters fall in love_

_when we got our hot pants on enough._

_And yes, of course we does_

_we runnin' this town just like a club_

_and no you don't wanna mess with us._

_Got Jesus on my necklaz-uz-uz..._

_Got that glitter on my eyes_

_Stockings ripped all up the si-_

"MISS ALEXANDRA!" One moment I was singing lyka bawse, then the next thing I knew Mey-Rin was laying on top of me with a nosebleed.

"Oh _my_! I'm s-so s-sorry, that I am! She stuttered.

"This would look really weird to anyone who decided to walk pass, but naw~ it's aight'. You don't have to get up or anything…." I said sarcastically. Seriously! The girl must've enjoyed the position we were in.

After I pointed out our predicament to her, she finally got up.

"What do you want anyway?" I asked, annoyed.

"Young Master wanted you to go to the sitting room, yes he did!" She suddenly remembered.

"Did he say why?" I pressed.

"Not that I remember…" Good god, the boy could be dying and she wouldn't remember.

I sighed once again and walked around the maid, trying to find my way to what I later found out to be one of the many sitting rooms. Who really needs to sit _that_ much!

Once I entered the right room, I saw Ciel, Sebastian and some random lady. The lady had glasses perched on her nose, a hat on top of her head tilted to one side with a ponytail on the other; she also had a beauty mark near the corner of her mouth. She dressed really stylishly. Her outfit was a low-cut blouse showing her boobs with a vest over it, a short skirt that peals away to reveal shorts underneath, a visible garter, and the normal Victorian era boots.

While I was admiring her clothes, she began to walk around me, almost like a lion circling it's pray.

"Is this the girl you told me about Earl?" Her hand shot out to my non-existent boobs while my entire face heated up like Bard blowing up the kitchen. "You were completely right; she does have the figure of an eight year old boy." While Sebastian and Ciel were busy smirking their asses off, I nearly exploded.

"YOU LITTLE BRAT! I _DO NOT _LOOK LIKE AN EIGHT YEAR OLD!" I yelled. I swear you could literally see the steam coming from my ears.

"You said I'm a '_little_ brat' but that's strange, I recall being taller than you." Ciel replied, still having that shit-eating grin on his face.

"Oh that's it we are so taking this to the streets bro!"

"We shall do no such thing."

"Why? You scared?"

"I just don't want to get my hands dirty with some _thing_ like you"

"Oh, so I'm a '_thing_' now?" I said imitating his voice.

"Weren't you always?"

"You son of a bi-"

"You will not use such language in my presence."

"It's not my fault you have the biggest pole on earth shoved up your ass." I growled.

"Ehem, Young Master, may I point out that there is still business to attend to." Sebastian said, interrupting our civilized conversation.

"Oh yes, I forgot. Alexandra this is Nina Hopkins, the tailor.

"Um hi," I began awkwardly. "I would say that it's nice to meet you but see as how you just molested me….."

"Oh pish posh," Nina said cheerily. "That was nothing." Does she mean there's more!

"Time to measure! Now lets get you undressed and on that pedestal!"

_Oh god…Please…**NOOOOOO!**_

While she began to strip me, Sebastian and Ciel started to leave the room.

'_Please __**help**__ me_!' I mouthed. Thy just left me hanging.

**It's official, I am now unable to use my laptop until I or my parents get me a new charger (The old one is broken to the point where I almost set the dining room table and the cord itself on fire.) Good ole' duct-tape just ain't cuttin' it anymore. I don't know when I'll have any kind of access to the internet but as soon as I do, I'll update. GOD THIS SUCKS. It's so hard trying to write without doing research on the episodes so most of the chapters I do update right now (If I do) they will most likely be fillers. DID I MENTION THAT THIS SUCKS? At least when school stars (FRESHMAN BABY, YEAH!) I'll actually DO my homework. Jk, I do my homework (sometimes). This is good for me T^T **

**Me: MOM PLEASE BUY ME A NEW CHARGER!**

**Mom: No. Just do what you were doing before you had the laptop.**

**Little Voice Me:_ I guess never coming out of my room is better than being on the computer and sharing my talent with the world. IF YOU DON'T WANT ME TO BE HAPPY JUST SAY IT._ **

**Me Out Loud: Yes, mother. **

**Little Voice Me: _I'm still not doing my home work._**

**Me Out Loud: I shall go read now.**


	8. That Otaku, Documenting

**BREAKING NEWS: _Life without internet still sucks._ **

**For those of you who are wondering how I'm writing this: I am on my sister's huge prehistoric internet-less Lenovo desktop that just so happens to have a somewhat up-to-date version of Word, ironic because my laptop didn't even _have_ Word... My days are now turning into one long episode of Pimp My Desktop. I tried doing research on episodes on my dad's laptop (it's rare for him to let me touch it) but it turns out that his version of Word is _STILL _newer than this computer's -_- Because of that, I then had to transfer my research to Notepad. The things I do for you guys….. LOVE YOU!**

**Anyway…. ONWARDS WITH THE STORY:**

July 29th:

Its summer and it's really hot. Speaking of hot, Sebastian now walks around the manor doing work without his tailcoat on. I never thought a guy could be _that_ sexy without showing skin. On the other hand, I get really bored around here and Ciel is too much of a stuck up bitch to care, so Sebas-chan (love his reaction when I call him that) gave me a journal to write in. THAT'S RIGHT, another freaking journal! I'll get rid of it eventually….

Yours Truly,

Epic Otaku

August 1st:

I tried on multiple attempts to dump this _thing_ but Sebas-chan just won't have it. When I try to stop writing in it he says, "I refuse to let you pester the Young Master, Therefore I shall not let you dispose of it until every page is filled with ink. And do _not _try to empty the fountain pen onto the book." _Damn _I was gonnatry that too….

Annoyed to an Extreme Extent,

Epic Otaku

August 2nd:

Sebastian wanted me to help Bard in the kitchen. He could've just told me to cook by myself because as soon as he took out the explosives I kicked his ass out. For dinner that night we had my parmesan chicken special. Tenderized chicken coated in parmesan cheese and bred crumbs, baked in the oven at 425 degrees, and a side of broccoli and cheese rice. Sebastian was impressed. BROWNIE POINTS!

I'm Really Awesome,

Epic Otaku

P.s. The desert was a lemon pound-cake with a slight lemon drizzle.

P.P.s. Sebastian smiled at me.

P.P.P.s. I think.

P.P.P.P.s. It could've easily been a smirk.

August 5th:

Today we went to town to (tongue twister) pick up my clothes. My wardrobe now consists of 10 everyday outfits, 5 ball-gowns, and an outside outfit since I like to move around. After we got my stuff, I hugged Ciel gushing about how much he "cared". I was really satisfied with how much I annoyed him. Sebastian was too, I could tell. Little Ciel is too cute to be a selfish brat.

Forever a Troll-Face,

Epic Otaku

August 6th:

Today I just walked around the garden singing Florence & the Machine:

_Regrets collect like old friends, _

_here to relive your darkest moments._

_I can see no way, I can see no way._

_And all of the ghouls come out to play._

_And every demon wants his pound of flesh, _

_but I like to keep some things to myself._

_I like to keep my issues strong;_

_it's always darkest before the dawn._

"It seems almost as if the song is talking about me." Sebastian suddenly pops up out of nowhere. I tried really hard to hide the fact that he had scared the hell out of me (see what I did there?). "Maybe it is." I replied. The crazy thing is, when I said that I could've sworn that I saw his eyes flash pink for a second…

Confused,

Epic Otaku

P.S. I think I like the arrogant bastard.

August 10th:

I'm so_**bored.**_

Dying of boredom,

Epic Otaku

August 11th:

It's soooooooooo boring.

Still bored,

Epic Otaku

August 16th:

Preparing for some random ball Ciel decided to throw. Not even gonna tell you how that's going…

Those three really are idiots,

Epic Otaku

August 18th:

The ball is today. I'm just chillin' at the snack table. Sebastian had tried to feed me cake. I let him. He also wanted me to dance with him. I would say I let him, but he kinda forced me. He said it would "improve my social status". Does he mean the one that doesn't exist?

The cake was awesome,

Epic Otaku

August 19th:

Sebastian likes to tease. I fell down a tree (don't ask) and got a bunch of scratches, so he _licked _them so that they would heal faster. Okay, so they did heal quickly

….BUT REALLY! I just want to slap that smirk off of his face so bad.

I Got it Bad,

Epic Otaku

August 20th:

Mey-Rin has a crush on Sebastian.

It's On,

Epic Otaku

August 25th:

I have a summer cold. I _have _to drink tea now. At least Sebastian has to take care of me now.

Tea is Gross,

Epic Otaku

August 26th:

Ciel isn't really that bad. Maybe he's starting to think of me as an older sister.

Imma Call Him Ci-Ci Now,

Epic Otaku

August 28th:

Bard has coffee. MY FRIGGIN HERO! I thought I'd have to live off of tea and scones for the rest of my time traveled life.

Coffee is Delicious,

Epic Otaku

August 29th:

Everyone's telling me that I'm getting taller.

I'M FINALLY GROWING (take that society!),

Epic Otaku

August 31st:

My clothes feel tight.

Uncomfortable,

Epic Otaku

September 1st:

It's getting cooler (finally) Sebastian put his tailcoat back on (nooooooooooooo)

He's Still _Sexay,_

Epic Otaku

September 2nd:

Mey-Rin walked in on me while I was bathing. Her nose bleeds a lot, se must be on cra- no, what's that drug they do these days?...Opium, that's it!

I'm Friends with a Druggie,

Epic Otaku

P.s. We cool but she still better back up off my man.

September 3rd:

I fell down a staircase the asked who put them there. In my defense, I was sleepy.

I'm Kinda Slow,

Epic Otaku

September 5th:

Puberty is hitting me like a brick. Guess I _am_ a late bloomer…

Finally Filling In,

Epic Otaku

P.s. Gotta love the pen name.

September 6th:

Sebastian is finally of my case about writing in this damned thing.

I'm a Free Woman (but I'll still write for the heck of it)

Epic Otaku

September 10th:

Praise the lord I have boobs. I'm nowhere close to Mey-Rin, but it's still something.

No Longer Flat as Cardboard,

Epic Otaku

September 12th:

I have come up with a plan:

Cue Mission Impossible theme.

Wait until Bard attempts to cook.

When he pulls out the explosives put the journal on the table.

Get the hell out of there .

Then POW! No more journal.

Evil Genius,

Epic Otaku

September 20th:

The plan is in action. FAREWELL MY FRIEND!

PEACE BITCH,

Epic Otaku

**This is officially my longest chapter *applause* I would like to say thank you to all of those who reviewed, favorited (not a word but who cares) and alerted my story. Thanks for keeping faith! LOL it sounds like I just accepted a Grammy XD Anyway, on the next chapter I shall begin to write my story according to the episodes. **

**dxlmao: I'm going to Westinghouse in Chicago, Il.**

**By the way, If you haven't seen the pictures I drew of Alexandra, My Deviantart is k-popper. Deviantart (minus the spaces)**


	9. That Otaku, Burning Up

**Just watched the Olympics. GO USA! During the male swimming event, in my head I was just cheering "Shirtless guys! Shirtless guys! Shirtless guys!" LOL. Oh, and Michael Phelps just made a world record for being the Olympian with the most medals. And the women's gymnastics team just won the gold in the championships. **

**The best part of that moment was seeing Jordan Weaver smile. God I love America! 3**

**Back to business….From now on, the story won't only be in Alex's Pov. Also, this is beginning one year after Alexandra 'arrived' at the Phantomhive Manor. **

**Begin:**

_**Sebastian's Pov:**_

"Young Master, It is time to wake up. We have a long day ahead of us." I spoke, gently shaking my Master awake.

Young Master sat up, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes like a small child.

"Today's tea is Earl Gray. You have the option of a scone or a muffin, which would you desire today?"

"A scone." He replied sipping his tea gracefully.

"What's scheduled today, Sebastian?"

"Chlaus, the head of the Funtom branch in India, is coming for a visit." I began, "We must begin preparations right away."

"See to it that you do."

"Yes, My Lord." I bowed at the waist, putting my hand on my chest where my heart should have been.

_**Alexandra's Pov:**_

I was sitting in kitchen eating breakfast and sipping my coffee with the rest of the servants when Sebastian came in. He clapped his hands together as if he had something to say and all of the servants (except for me of course) automatically came to attention.

Sebastian glared at me for a moment before beginning.

"Today at 6:00 the Young Master will have a very important guest visiting. He would appreciate it if you four (What do I ever do?) would be on your best behavior. There is still much work to be done."

"Finny, Tend to the garden."

"Yes, Sir!" Were totally screwed.

"Mey-Rin, Take care of the guest china and silverware."

"Yes, Sir!" Double screwed.

"And Bardroy, you stay away from the kitchen."

"Yes, Sir!" Triple screwed. I mean, come on! We all know Bard can't stay away for his life!

"Mr. Tanaka…. Drink your tea."

"Ho, ho, ho!"

"Alexandra, see to it that these three, and yourself, stay on task and out of trouble."

"No prob." Super screwed.

I long ago realized that after a year at the Phantomhive residence, the story was beginning to follow the Kuroshitsuji storyline. I was starting to wonder when and if that would happen. But one thing I have to know is…What am _I_ doing here?

I snapped out of my deep thoughts and looked up to find those three gathered in a huddle. With my ninja-like stealth, I crept over to listen in (not really, I just strolled over there but I gotta make this exciting right?).

"This is our chance!" Mey-Rin gushed excitedly.

"Yeah!" Finny interjected just as motivated, "We can finally impress the Young Master!"

"And I can finally beat 'at Sebastian!" Bard growled clenching his fists.

"Let's go!" They all said in unison and ran off.

I looked after them, frowning as their cloud of dust started to disappear. This definitely wouldn't end well….

_**Meanwhile Sebastian began working as well:**_

I removed my tailcoat and pushed back the sleeves of my shirt, preparing to cook dinner for my master and his guest. I looked up at all of the ingredients and utensils before me when the bell to the Young Master's study rang. It is typical for him to require my assistance when there's so much work to be done. Sighing, I made myself decent before seeing what Young Master wanted.

_**Back to Alex:**_

I totally should've seen this one coming. I _knew_ we were screwed! Sebastian stood in front of us, pacing with his eyes closed and his fingers pinching the bridge of his nose as if he were thoroughly frustrated. Don't get me wrong, I would be totally pissed too, just not able to hide it that well. Sebastian stopped and sighed. Then he stared all of us down.

"What exactly happened?" He said, surprisingly calm.

" I THOUGHT I WOULD GET OUT THE GUEST TEASET OUT OF THE CABINET WHEN I TRIPPED AND FELL ON THE CLEANING CART AND CRASHED INTO IT!" Mey-Rin cried.

"I WANTED TO GET RID OF THE WEEDS IN THE GARDEN, BUT THE LID ON THE HERBICIDE SPRAYER WAS OPEN!" Finny cried as well.

"Well you see the meat was just sitting there raw on the table so I though I'd cook it…. With a flamethrower." Bard said, awkwardly rubbing the back of his head.

"WE'RE SO SORRY MR. SEBASTIAN!" They all yelled.

He sighed. "What about you Alexandra?".

I shrugged nonchalantly. "It's impossible to watch three people at the same time."

"We have no tea set, the meat is charred, and the garden comes across as a graveyard. What is there left to do?" _Gasp! Could it be? Has the All-Mighty Sebastian been defeated! _Sebastian sighed for the third time that day.

"Dude, the Japanese say that sighing takes years off of your life." I said tired of hearing him sigh.

"That's it!" Sebastian exclaimed, slamming his fist onto his palm. He snatched Mr. Tanaka's Japanese-style tea cup and held it out." We shall make due with this."

I stood outside next to Bard and Mey-Rin as we waited for the carriage to stop and the guest to get out. Everyone was.

"Oh how impressive!" Chlaus said.

"It's called a stone garden," Sebastian stated. "It's a traditional feature in Japan."

"Truly impressive! I would expect nothing less from the Phantomhives"

"We thought it would be appropriate to serve dinner outside this evening. Allow Alexandra to escort you inside until the meal is ready." Sebastian informed him.

I took his things and led him inside to Ciel's study.

_**Later on. Ciel's Pov:**_

I moved the game piece two spaces.

"The progress we've been having at the east India factory is quite Astonishing!" Pfft, yeah right. "We already have the makings of a top-notch staff."

I cut him off in a nonchalant tone, "Bewitched by the eyes of the dead."

"Oh, what poor luck my lord, it appears you lose a turn." Alexandra said with a voice void of emotion just as her face. She learns quickly.

"Hmph, right now is the perfect time to begin expanding the company and building a strong labor force-" Chlaus began.

"Go on, it's your turn." I once again interrupted , motioning toward the board-game. I don't wish to talk about such things. Yet, I'm not really interested in the game either.

"Oh….yes, I just spin this piece then." He said reaching for the spinner. This is almost painful to watch….

He moved the correct amount of spaces and began to make himself more comfortable, "Now, what I truly wanted to ask you about, perhaps you could contribute another twelve-thousand pounds to support our expansion?" I only looked at him.

"I believe it would be quite a profitable venture for you my lord, and I would consider it an honor to help the Funtom Company-"

He is so simple to see through. "Lose a leg in the enchanted forest…" The guest looked up, "-and it's your turn again."

"How is that?"

"My lord's lost a turn, have you forgotten?" Alexandra commented.

Chlaus smiled at her. "Yes of course…" He replied. He spun the dial , "Right I move six…" He picked up the piece.

"No you don't, you lost one leg remember?" Alex whispered, snatching the piece away from his hand and moving it three spaces. "The amount of spaces is cut in half, there is no hope of getting it back."

I smirked, "That's right, once something is truly lost, as my maid so correctly stated; there is absolutely no hope what so ever of getting it back." I snatched his piece from the board.

"I am so sorry sir, but your body is burnt by raging flames," Alexandra clucked her tongue as Chlaus leaned back in his seat. She didn't even realize that she was slightly frightening the man.

_**Alexandra's Pov:**_

I had left the room and came back with tea. I just finished placing down the tray for Ciel when I heard Chlaus mutter something that sounded like "Childish Brat…" It took all of my willpower not to kill the bastard.

"Sir I would appreciate it if you didn't talk of my master in such ways.

My voice made him jump. "Oh, I didn't mean childish in that sense. I mean it takes a child's eyes to see what's really important! It's a true gift, maybe that's what has made the Phantomhives dentations for most toy makers! It truly impresses me…." Impresses him my ass.

"Mister Chlaus, didn't you know?" I'm pretty sure there's sparkle and roses in the background now. What is this, a Shoujo manga? "Donburi has been used in Japan since ancient times as a feast to express gratitude to laborers. A dish given as a treat to a person who has rendered great service…That is Donburi!"

"A-a pile of raw beef, so this is our dinner? Chlaus asked.

"Yes but surely you've heard of it sir? This is a traditional Japanese delicacy! A dish offered as a sign of gratitude to someone who has accomplished important work. That is the wonder of Donburi!"

I have to admit, that was awesome. Even my mouth was open.

"This is a token from our master to show his thanks for all of your hard work on the company's behalf." I stated simply. Chlaus's face was priceless right now.

Mey-Rin Walked from the bush the three muske-idiots were hiding behind, pushing along a cart.

"This is excellent my lord!" Chlaus cried making me jump. "What an inspired idea you have!" His arms flared out, "The legendary Phantomhive hospitality right before my eyes!"

"The vintage tonight was specially selected to compliment the flavor of soy sauce." Sebastian gave Mey-Rin a sidelong glance before calling her over to poor the wine. "Now Mey-Rin, why are you just standing there? Poor the guest a glass of wine." He whispered to her.

"Y-yes sir!" Uh oh, she's getting all mushy…

"Ey." Bard said to me from the bush the three muske-idiots were hiding behind.

"What?" Finny asked.

"Is it just me or is Mey-Rin actin' a li'le strange?"

"Sebastian's watching me," I heard her mumble as she stumbled up to the table. Almost losing her footing more than once. "I can't take it, don't look at me like that!"

"Maybe I should get that for y-" I began. I didn't' get to finish my offer, however, because the wine had begun pooling onto the white tablecloth. I snatched the bottle away from her hands and saw the wine get closer, and closer to Chlaus. It even got to the point where it was almost dripping into his lap!

But before it could reach him, Sebastian yanked away the tablecloth, taking the spill with it but leaving every thing else in its original place. The wine glass only rocked slightly back and forth before becoming still once again. Chlaus looked back at the table surface in shock, totally missing the entire thing.

"Where did the table cloth go?" He shouted in complete surprise, touching the shiny and smooth surface of the table.

Ciel smirked (he smirks way to much for a 13-year old boy…) and I made the other two carry the clumsy maid back into the manor.

"I had it taken away." The boy said while continuing to eat. "There was a _slight stain_ on it. Do excuse us for our grave discourtesy. Please, relax and enjoy the meal." His eye turned to me. "Alex, pour our guest his drink."

I got right to it before following Sebastian and the rest into the manor. The others had their lips full with Sebastian's ass. He's just a show-off. Bard even said he was like Superman but I wouldn't go that far…

He replied, "I'm no superman (Scrubs moment), merely one hell of a butler." This dude is so not cool. He may be hot but his ego could barely fit through the door.

That damn demon.

That was quite the magnificent dinner my lord." Chlaus commented while patting his stomach. Ciel sat down in his chair in front of the board game. "Now about that contract for the factory's expansion."

"First we must finish the board game before moving onto boring subjects." Ciel said, making the guest's eyebrow twitch.

"Ah, but you see I have a pressing appointment in a little bit, perhaps another time?"

"Children can be quite demanding about their games," Ciel said, looking at him with one blue eye.

"Surely you wouldn't want him to get upset?" I put in.

"No of course not. May I be allowed to use the telephone?" Ciel mad a small motion with his hand.

_**Sebastian's Pov:**_

Unknowingly to Chlaus, I had followed him to another location in the mansion. I listened in as he spoke to someone on the telephone, "I'm tired of babysitting this childish brat. Yes, I have already sold the factory, now all that is left is to pocket the extra cash and see how much we can squeeze out of the little Earl." He continued ranting. Still unaware that he was being watched.

"The employees? Ha! Who cares about them?" He laughed. In the doorway a face as white as a ghost with sunken eyes and no mouth lingered in the prominent darkness. The man turned but when he looked the apparition had already disappeared.

He left the room and walked past the painting of the Earl and his family. On the face of Vincent Phantomhive, he once again saw the ghostly face. Only this time it turned to peer at him.

Chlaus rubbed his eyes, "Surely I am seeing things." He muttered to himself.

"Bewitched by the Eyes of the Dead." The name of that single space almost echoed down the empty corridors.

He walked down the hallway opening countless doors. "This manor is like a giant maze, you can't even find a simple room such as the Earl's drawing room."

"_Bewitched by the Eyes of the Dead." _The whisper rang again.

Floorboards began to creak as I walked and the ghostly face appeared once more.

"AH! Stay back creature! Please stay away from me!

_**Alexandra's Pov:**_

One moment I was helping Bard take down the picture Ciel didn't want then the next Chlaus came fly past us, yelling. He slipped on Mey-Rin's mop bucket which just so happened to be right by the stairs. He fell and a sickening crack filled the air as the bone in his leg snapped.

"Oh, sir are you alright?" Mey-Rin asked as we ran over. His leg was twisted in the fucking _sickest _way ever.

"_Now you lose a leg in the Enchanted Forest_."

Sebastian appeared in front of the man, "Surely you aren't leaving yet sir," He said. "We haven't given you the full Phantomhive treatment yet."

"_Your body is burnt by raging flames."_

It's oven time.

**So how was that you guys? Did I do a good job. Please review.**


	10. That Otaku, Brought Along

**Last night I stayed up all night and didn't go to sleep until 9:00 am. I wouldn't let myself go to sleep until I finished the chapter. I'm so stubborn and I push myself way too hard ….**

**Well let's start: **

Finny, Mey-Rin and I sat on the cold wooden floor while Bard climbed a ladder to inspect a chewed wire.

"So, what's the damage?" I asked in my best impression of a British detective.

"Body 'ell this wire's done for!" Bards voce echoed from the ceiling.

All of us sighed simultaneously. "Please, not the rats again…." I groaned. And I seriously thought the rats in _my_time were bad! Bard climbed down from the ladder.

"This is getting ridiculous." Ya think? The chef kept complaining while rubbing the back of his head. "I 'eard they had been plaguing London lately but I never expected them to be a problem this far from the city." A mouse scampered by and I just watched it with bored eyes. I know what happens next so I moved out of the way, just as a huge statue came flying by my head.

"Looks like it got away." Finny said, laughing awkwardly.

"What you laughin' about, are you trying to kill us idiot!?" Bard yelled at Finny.

"Aww, don't yell at him," I said walking over to finny and cuddling him like a puppy. "How could you possibly be mad at a face like this?" And sure enough finny was doing the sad puppy-dog face.

Then another rat came by.

"Look! Another one yes there is!" Mey-Rin shouted, pointing at the tiny grey fur ball.

"After it! Catch it!" The three muske-idiots shouted as they ran after it. I followed but while strolling, thinking about my purpose in this somewhat unfamiliar world.

After a while, I got tired of chasing (walking) after those three so I went to my room.

**~CTO~**

"Ah, there you are Alexandra. My master wishes to see you." I was only half paying attention but I walked in, and noticed the large amount of people there. One woman was fully clad in red. Madam Red, of course. Next my eyes locked onto the Chinese man with a woman sitting on him, Lau. And then there is scar-face with some weird Italian name that I can't think of right now. My eyes began to wander to the other men that I also couldn't name.

"It appears you have a rat problem," A husky man said (_GASP! Rat problem!? I didn't even notice!),_ "It makes me wonder just when you will get rid of the pests…"

"In good time my friend, somebody will." Lau said.

"Indeed," Madam Red agreed. I knew immediately that they were talking in code, given the countless times I had watched the show. "He prefers to settle things with one blow," She turned to look at the mini-lord smirking (his permanent facial expression) in his chair. "Will you pass on this turn Lord Phantomhive?" She asked Ciel.

He closed his eye, resting his head on his fist. "I will pass," He looked at me to finish.

"It is my lords' policy not to shoot when he knows that he shall miss." I continued for him, not entirely caring.

"That's all very well, but when _will_ you handle the problem?" A man with graying hair, glasses, and a mustache questioned.

"Anytime you like, the rats will soon come looking for their forbidden cheese, and I hold the key to the store house." He stated. Scar-face smacked the que ball, giving the moment a creepy feeling as the words were left to sink in. Why can't they just say what they mean!?

"Even so, locating the vermin's nest and eliminating the problem proves to be a tedious task, I would concentrate on preparing a suitable reward." Ciel finished.

"You are a vulture…" Randall! That was the old dude's name! I mentally face palmed.

"Sir Randall… I would be careful with how you smear the Phantomhive family name." I whispered to him. "What is your next move My Lord?"

"It is time to put an end to this worthless game, don't you think Alex?" He stood and walked past Randall. They held a 2 second conversation and Ciel passed the pool stick to me. Is he fucking kidding me?! I'm pretty damn sure he knows I suck at pool! I just took the stick from him and sat on the pool table aiming for the shot. "I will send a carriage for you later then." He added, clearly meaning something no one else knew. I leaned down and aimed for the white ball, as Sebastian continued Ciel's thought.

"We can even prepare some light entertainment for you," He said. Making it sound like a threat.

The husky man stood up, "You pass your turn twice and now you let your maid, an amateur no doubt, go after them all at once!"

"It's only natural," I growled, sneering at him. How dare he call me and amateur and be right!

"Careful maid, know your place or your mouth will undo you." Randall threatened. I didn't listen. I ain't never scared! I said in my head. I'm pretty sure my, ironically, expressionless face added to the mysterious and dark mood. I smacked the ball hitting the red one, which went into the black one and angled off. The red one pocketed and the black one went in too. The que ball sat on the edge and stopped. Lyka Bawse.

**~CTO~**

"For today's tea we have a special Darjeely from Fortnum & Mason."

"Smells lovely, tea can be excellent when made well, can't it Ran-Mao?" Lau asked his female companion, she nodded and took a sip.

"Grell," Madam Red called. Yay~! I _finally_ get to met Grell! He's so gonna be the best gay friend I never had!

"Yes my lady?" Grell answered shyly. He's so adorable as a butler….. Even though Grell isn't as hot and sexy as Sebastian, I still have my fan-girl moments.

"Learn something from Sebastian…" She replied. Grell seemed to be disappointed by her words even though I knew he didn't give a damn.

"Just look at him, I mean his physique!" She started a pedo smile lighting up her features as she rubbed Sebastian's ass. That's sexual harassment. He can take you to court for that. She better keep those eyes _and_ those hands off my man. "You should quit this country job and come work for me in the city!" Rape anyone? That's right folks! Women _can _rape men.

"Ahem!" I cleared my throat angrily. "Madam Red." I said, indicating that she should back off. Man, she's a serious cougar….

"Oh! Sorry, I couldn't help it; it looked like he needed a physical!" Psh, physical my ass (or should I say his). "Just a doctor's habit~" She stated in a sing-song voice. I sweatdropped while a tick mark appeared on Ciel's forehead. I tuned them out but snapped back into reality when I saw Madam Red _literally_ spit fire at Lau and held Ciel like a rag doll.

"Watch it! You better keep your filthy paws off my darling nephew!" She seethed. This kitty got claws.

"You wound me, Madam." Lau said pretending to be hurt. "I would never paw him in his own home." You would paw him somewhere else then? Dude, that is seriously creepy…

"Are you saying you would if we were anywhere else? Careful! You're on thin ice now sir!" She dropped Ciel and proceeded to breathe fire at Lau like a dragon.

Ciel sighed and motioned for me to follow him and we walked out of the room. "Master…" We heard Sebastian call. Ciel turned to face him. I kept staring down the hallway. "Today's desert, it's a deep dish by prepared with fresh apples and raisins it will be ready soon." I deadpanned, he stopped us t tell us about desert. Even though his deserts are like a gift from god which, of course, is ironic considering the guy is a demon. But really! "Would you like to eat with your guests?" Hell No!

"Bring it to my study, I am done here. Once you serve them return to the study, the three of us have something to talk about." Uhh, _three_?

Sebastian bowed with the usual hand over his heart. "Yes, My Lord."

**~CTO~**

Ciel took a bite of the pie in front of him, he swallowed before speaking, "Alexandra, I have summoned you to my study because I am aware of what you have seen and ask you to not tell anybody."

"Well of course I wouldn't. How many people do you know that would believe that your butler is a demon?"

He choked on a bit of his pie, "How do you know?" He asked me, surprised.

"I'll tell you that another time, but I thought you already knew that I know."

His eye narrowed, "I don't recall you telling me that."

"Well I do because I did when I first came here. _You_ must've forgotten!"

"Quite frankly, Alex I _know _I wouldn't forget something of such great importance."

"Too bad, because you did."

"Or you're the one who can't get you're facts straight."

"_Or _you're the one who's too stuck up to admit that I'm right."

"I'm not 'stuck up', you are just barbaric."

"Barbaric? Really? What am I supposed to be, a caveman?"

"If you prefer that term."

By then I was seething. That cocky bastard.

Sebastian brought a knuckle to his chin and began speaking, "Actually Young Master, she did make that point clear on her arrival."

"HA! IN YO' FACE, I'M RIGHT!"

"Who asked you, Sebastian?!" Ceil snapped with an angry blush on his face.

"I was only refreshing your memory, My Lord." Sebastian and I had identical smirks on our faces.

**~CTO~**

I left Ciel's study when he finished his pie. Today Ciel gets kidnapped. How can I stop that from happening? Maybe I'm not here to stop that. I wonder…. I didn't even realize Sebastian had been calling my name until he grabbed my shoulder.

I spun on my heel in surprise and accidentally bitch-slapped him across the face. "WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT FOR!?" I yelled. I went mute when I saw the death glare and the pink swirling in his demonic eyes. "Uhh, my bad…. It was self defense?"

He brought a gloved hand to his slightly red cheek, "Are you sure you were trying to defend yourself or was that a question?" He asked, distaste evident in his voice.

"Defending myself?" I said, once again unsure. Sebastian only sighed.

Just then Mey-Rin, (with mouse traps on her hand) Finny, (who was dressed as a… giant mouse) and Bard, (who had two soup ladles) came sprinting down the hall chasing, you guessed it, mice! Sebastian ran forward with speed only he could have he snatched the mouse off of the ground and dropped it in a net that Finny had been holding.

He brushed off his hands; he didn't even get them _dirty_. "Now, enough of that stop playing and get back to work." I just stood there examining my nails while the three screw ups deflated.

I got bored so I decided to see what Ciel was doing

**~CTO~**

I strolled down the hall to Ciel's study when I saw a man standing in front of his door. Shit, shit, _shit_! I knew it would happen today, but not this soon. Maybe if I just snuck up behind hi-

"_ACHOO!_" Why the fuck do I always choose to sneeze at the perfect moment? It's like trying to sneak out of the house with Hay-Fever…

I took a huge breath predicting what would happen next. Just as I finished taking my breath a clothed hand clamped down over my mouth.

"Oh no you don't go calling for help!" A man said I held my breath, they won't get me! Before one minute was up I started flailing in the man's arms but the man's grip only tightened, why didn't I think this through! My air supply is running low! I felt my chest constrict with the lack of air. The only option for me now was to join Ciel.

It's time to take a trip to Scar-face's house, I don't wanna die but either way I am kinda fucked.

I exhaled and took in a much needed breath. The chemical hit me like a rock, I was out within seconds, I had just enough time to see them drag out a limp Ciel.

The world went dark. Maybe I should've come up with a plan before trying to play superhero?

**~CTO~**

"The policemen of England's Underworld," The Italian's voice said. Azzuro Vanel! That was his name…. "One of the nobles who has done the royal families dirty work for generations and more to come," My eyes were heavy, and I was exhausted. Not to mention I was tied to a chair.

The room smelled slightly of cigars, "The queen's guard dog," Azzuro continued, does he ever shut up? "Does the disposing of anyone who disagrees with her. Just how many nicknames do you have? How many families have been crushed and tossed aside because of you? Ciel Phantomhive."

I opened my eyes at his name, Ciel? Of course he was here. I saw Ciel sitting, bound by leather belts, against a wall. He was frowning at the man. "I thought it would be you, you shame your family Azzuro Vanel." Azzuro light his cigar; I made a face at it, which he saw.

"Is there something wrong girl?" He addressed me taking a drawn out breath on is cigar afterwards.

"Two things actually, one: I have a name and it isn't girl you fucktard!" Shut up now Alex! Good god I'm gonna get myself killed…. "Second, I don't like cigarettes or cigars, or people who smoke them." This earned me a slap across the face, I held my glare.

"Whore, how dare you talk to me that way!?"

"Easily, I just open my mouth and the words come out." He slapped me and my face whipped to the side. Is this the world's way of getting back at me for slapping Sebastian? Karma is a bitch….

"Come now, little lord Phantomhive, do you know how hard it is for the entire mafia here? You English men have nothing but tea on the brain." He walked forward and took another puff on the cigar. Vanel knelt down, "It makes it difficult to penetrate those small minds of yours so we are forced to think outside the box to make money-" He scratched his forehead, "-so we found the drug trade."

"The Pharmacy Act of 1868 made Opium- a restricted substance. That is the queen's decree, and I have made it my sworn duty to eliminate those drugs and the vermin who see fit to distribute them." He's lying. His duty is not only to get rid of drugs.

Vanel sighed irritably, "This is why I hate all you Inglesi. The queen this, the queen that! You act like this woman is your own mother!" He grabbed Ciel's chin, making look up.

He better get his fucking dirty mitts off of Ciel. I swear, if my hands were free…. "You're lining your pockets while pretending the whole time you are better than the rest of us. In the end though we are no different from each other!"

"Yeah right, Ciel is a better person than you'll ever be." I shouted from my chair leaning forward as far as my restraints would allow me. "He is loyal to his queen whereas _you _are a backstabbing bitch!" WHEN WILL I SHUT THE HELL UP!?

"You learn your place shouls, you may find that where you end up is shittier then where you started." He said to me, grabbing my face tightly while whispering the menacing words in my ear. He released me and turned back to Ciel, squatting down to his height.

Ciel's expression remained nonchalant, "I have left orders about your key, and if I don't come back my servants will know and make sure the authorities get it." What the child Earl said wiped the smirk off of the man's face and placed it upon Ciel's. "I am sorry; I have no interest in getting along with somebody like you." He's awesome and all but he should really be quiet, like _**now **_(and I should take my own advice). Azzuro stood up and pointed a gun to Ciel's head.

I gasped, "You brat don't underestimate me! My men are already waiting at your estate. Now, where is the key? Spit it out soon and you can save your servants from doing out one by one." As if that could happen. The butler is a demon, finny is hella strong, and both bard and Mey-Rin can shoot guns lyk bawses.

Ciel cocked his head to the side, his smirk growing to a sort of smile I guess. "Oh I think they will be alright, but you had better hope your man dogs know how to fetch properly." The air was still for a few moments, and then the sound of flesh on flesh filled the air. Ciel grunted and I saw him fall.

"_CIEL_!" I cried, the cigar dropped to the floor, Vanel's boot smashed it into the carpet. I felt tears welling up. Even though Ciel is really annoying, when have this sibling-like love hate relationship going on.

"Did you all hear that?" Vanel looked a little lunatic-ish as he shouted into the phone, "The time for talk is over now." He slammed the phone down.

**~CTO~**

"Mister Sebastian!" The clumsy maid called as she ran down the hall towards the demon, a letter in her hand. "I just found a letter. yes I did!"

"Addressed to whom?" Sebastian asked.

"To the servants, of the Earl Ciel Phantomhive!" she called breathless. Sebastian turned slightly and glanced out the window, his eyes narrowing as he saw the sniper sitting in the trees.

The sniper panicked and lowered the scope from his eye. Just then the Mey-Rin tripped on her shoelace, this caused the man to raise the gun again. The maid flew through the air and smashed against Sebastian sending them both flying backwards.

The sniper fired the gun too late, it shattered a vase resting on the table where Sebastian's head was just a few moments ago. A fresh pie fell safely back onto its platter.

"The letter please," Sebastian said in a monotone.

Mey-Rin looked up, her face red like a tomato with a deep blush. "Letter?" she questioned staring at the envelope in her hands. "Oh! Yes!"

Sebastian held the same dead expression as he read the letter aloud. "If you ever wish to see the little earl safely returned, along with that blue haired maid, then come to Nova Garden, Bethenal Green as soon as possible." The maid stood behind him fantasizing about god knows (_god_ probably doesn't even want to know) what, "Goodness what a dreadful letter, just look at all the cross out and hastily scribbled words in the corner. Clearly Alexandra wasn't meant to come along." He mentally smirked at the thought of how she had gone.

"Sebastian," Finny called, "What 'appened 'ere?"

"What the devil is going on here?" Madam Red interrogated.

"Sorry for the noise my lady, nothing is wrong I assure you." He bowed, "Now if you will excuse me." He handed the pie he was holding to Bard, "If you wouldn't mind cleaning this up." He continued his way down the hall.

"So… when you say clean it up, you mean eat it right?" Bard looked around for the butler, "Sebastian?"

T~T~T~T

A car raced down a dirt path away from the Phantomhive Manor. "Sorry I missed!"

"What do you mean you _missed_!?" Azzuro Vanel shouted over the phone. "You are complete idiots! Never should have hired you British scum! Just get back here!"

The one who had been on the phone turned to see if they were being followed, a dark figure chased after them, "Uh sir, something is off! Somebody or something is following us!" The dark figure grew closer.

Over the static of the phone Vanel heard their terrified voices, he did not care though. They had failed him. "What is that?" One voice said.

"Ah what is wrong?" Vanel spat, "Did you little girls see a bear in the woods?" the man next to Vanel chuckled.

A yell came from the other end, wiping the expression from his face leaving him with a questioning look.

"What is it did somebody find you? Talk to me!"

A gruff voice answered him, but with a reply that left his questions unanswered, "Hurry it up!"

The car made a screeching turn on its side, a foot slammed down on the pedals. The two men continued their frantic run down another pass, the figure still behind them. "It's… it's coming!" The one on the left stuttered. "It's closer than before!"

He could see the sadistic smirk on the pursuer's face.

"That's it I have had enough of these stupid games already! Answer me or you are next to die!" Through the static on the other end Vanel was able to make out their terrified shouts.

"No good! It's here! _AAAAAAAAAH_!" The doomed souls of the drivers screamed in unison.

A crash reached Vanel's ears. Static followed, "What…. Hello? What happened?"

The blue haired boy on the ground smirked, and the girl tied to the chair stared at the Italian man, shaking her head for she knew the gruesome fates of the two men.

"That is too bad." Ciel chuckled, the girl looked at him.

"Ciel, you're okay?" She more questioned than stated.

The boy continued, not paying attention to the worried bluenette. "Sounds like your little game of fetch is over."

Azzuro was sweating, his eyes widened. What had happened to the two men? What could have possibly done that? Vanel continued his assault on the boy with his built up tension. Blood spluttering out from him as he was kicked repeatedly in the stomach and his face beaten, "Just shut up! Shut your mouth you damn brat!"

"CIEL!" The girl cried, "DON'T HURT HIM, JUST BEAT ME INSTEAD!" She leaned even farther forward, slightly tearing the ropes.

"Alex…. shut…. Up." Ciel commanded silencing her.

Vanel picked up the phone, "You listen here! If one of you doesn't answer right now I swear your life will be like hell!"

As if on que a dark, male voice replied. "Hello."

**You guys, the next chapter will have a _very _interesting twist. You will not be disappointed.**


	11. That Otaku, Unknown Secret

**Here is the update the world has been waiting for. If not here it is anyway:**

I swear to god when I heard Sebastian's voice over the phone I nearly had a stroke "Hello…" How in the world could he be so nonchalant when he had just killed two men?! No wait, he was still teetering on the edge of the cliff with them in the car…

"Who is this?" Vanel asked bordering on insane.

"Pardon me, but I represent the Phantomhive Household. I was merely wondering if my master might be available."

"Well damn, Sebastian, Way to forget about the maid! YOU REALLY SUCK!" I shouted at the phone.

"It appears you are unharmed, Alexandra." Why could I hear the phone all the way from here? I've always had good hearing but never this abnormal.

By now, Vanel's entire body was quivering. "Hello?" Sebastian's voice came from the receiver with a questioning tone. "Are you there? Hello?"

"You should probably answer him nimrod!" I called, earning myself a death glare from both Ciel and Azzuro. I leaned forward more. When did the ropes get this lose?

"Woof." The bark came from Ciel, his whole body facing the wall. If we weren't in a life-threatening situation I would totally be fan-girling about how _ABSOLUTELY ADORABLE_ that was!

"Very good young master, I will come to retrieve you _both_ (yeah he better put emphasis on that) momentarily. Please hold on."

Why does he make us sound like a package he's picking up or something!? The phone clicked off.

I pictured Sebastian with the two hit men, their life balancing on the edge of a cliff. They were absolutely shaking under the demon's glare. I know the anime and the manga like the back of my hand. For a second, after I snapped out of my play by play description of the episode, I hear a distant explosion. This was really beginning to get strange (and by strange I mean absolutely fucking crazy!). There was no way I could hear the explosion, they had to be miles away! Though, somehow I know this was real...

I swear Vanel, he looked like his mistress just told him that he was pregnant and he was slowly dying with a terminal disease. So let's say it was a mix between total shock and fear.

"Hey, Italian dude?" I whispered, that snapped out of his shocked/absolutely terrified trance. He yelled to the men behind him.

"Listen up! The Phantomhive boy has help on the way! Secure the gate! Be ready to kill anything on sight! DO NOT LET ANYTHING GET THROUGH DO YOU UNDERSTAND!"

Gun fire and screams of dying men suddenly filled my ears. Oh god, what the hell was Sebastian doing to them?

"MY ARM! HE SHATTERED THE BONE!" One man shrieked.

I smirked, "Looks like your positively screwed Azzuro Vanel!" I laughed. His wrath then turned to me. A punch that definitely should have broken my jaw turned my face towards the wall. I felt a sweet yet coppery taste of blood in my mouth; Damn, I bit my tongue.

"Shut up bitch! You think you are so much better than me don't you Whore well just shut your damn mouth!" He might be a little touched in the head (courtesy of our very own Sebastian Michealis).

He stopped his psycho rant when even more guns fired; a sound of clanging metal followed. Oh lord, please don't tell me he brought out the platter and silverware….

Vanel smirked, "Looks like it's the end of the line for your savior Little Lord!" The madman sneered. His smirk faded as the gunfire slowly died, and sound of shattering plates filled our ears along with screams of pain. Shit…the china _too_!?

I always found it really scary that he killed people with butter knives. Do you know how much _power_ that takes!? Vanel really started to panic when no more guns were heard.

He stood facing the door, a gun trembling in his hand. Sebastian pushed both doors open, his famous 'Don't-fuck-with-me-or-I-will-not-hesitate-to-kill-your-ass' face. But since that's quite the mouthful I'll just call it the Dfwmoiwnhtkya Face…. He bowed, "I have come to retrieve my master and maid." I do have a name….

"Is this a joke?" Azzuro asked in disbelief. "I was expecting some giant and instead I get a scrawny dandy in a tailcoat." What ever happened to 'don't judge a book by its cover'? Honestly! Even though the book looks really hot…. But that's another thought for another day.

"Who are you anyway? The possibility that you are just a butler is far out of the question!" Yeah right.

"No sir," Sebastian replied calmly. "You see I am simply one hell of a butler." The overused and still incredibly awesome catchphrase.

"Heh, sure, it doesn't matter anyway. I have no intention of fighting. Not yet at least." His eyes narrowed and his smile grew, he gripped Ciel by the top of his head.

"Let him go fuck-face!" I yelled glaring. A bit of blood dribbled out of my mouth.

"Miss Alexandra, it appears you are bleeding…" Oh really!? I totally didn't notice…

Suddenly I heard whispering. I think it was coming from the other side of the wall near the huge painting. _SHIT_, why don't I remember what happens next? Perfect timing right?

My attention was diverted to Ciel when Vanel pointed a gun at his head.

He was kneeling against a wall… it was obviously his last attempt to get his way. "You better have what I ask for!"

"It is right here," Sebastian said. I looked over to Ciel. However my head snapped back to Sebastian when I heard the beginning of a click, the sound a gun makes when fired. That's when everything felt as if it was in slow motion. At momentum only known to supernatural beings, I ran in front of Sebastian, taking a defensive stance (I didn't know what the hell I would do against a gun but, hey). Even If he would live I was determined not to personally witness the gory scene that would've taken place. Just as the bullet burst through the painting I instinctively put my hands out in front of me.

Suddenly, a bright blue light illuminated the room and the onslaught of bullets was halted by the force-field in front of Sebastian and I. In that moment, I never felt so different yet so…._me. _Although it sounds like something from one of those stereotypical finding yourself teenage dramas, it was true. It just felt right. Like this powerful feeling is where I belonged. But you can't really belong in a feeling…. can you?

Just when I thought this was where things would end, me saving the day (pfft, guess that'll never happen), the bright blue orb faltered and regained its strength, though not without a casualty. I had been hit. When the shield weakened A bullet whizzed through my protection and hit me in the shoulder. And what should you do in a moment of crisis? _IGNORE THE PAIN _(pain is for the _weak_)! I kept the force-field up until the bullets finally stopped and the men burst through the now torn painting.

Azzuro just watched, I'm sure he was scared shitless.

"Non può essere! Lei è una strega! Essa deve essere!" _It can't be! She's a witch! She must be! _He's officially lost it. Although there is no evidence stating that he had it in the first place….

"THAT'S IT! This must end now!" He was shaking, his face was pale and his eyes were bloodshot..

He tapped the end of his gun under the bored looking Ciel's face, "Don't worry, you have so many ends I doubt you will be alive for that much longer!" He laughed hysterically.

"I am tired of messing around. How much longer are you two planning to play around?" Ciel asked with the same bored look as before. REALLY!? After all that just happened in the last 10 minutes you still feel unimpressed!? Good ole Alex gets no love around here I swear.

"Guns today are so much more efficient than they used to be." Sebastian began, examining the wound in my shoulder. "They can shoot so many more bullets now."

Vanel flipped his shit in a sense. "What are you doing? Kill them now Idiots!" The men pointed their guns at Sebastian. Too late… Sebastian flung the small objects back at the owners, each one piercing them in a fatal blow. Oh dear god, this is insane!

"Oh dear, what an awful thing to do to such perfectly good blouse…" he sighed glancing at my wound.

"REALLY? THAT'S WHAT YOU FOCUS ON! MY FUCKING SHOULDER HAS A HOLE IN IT AND YOUR WORRIED ABOUT THE MOTHER FUCKING SHIRT!?" This butler really needs to get his priorities straight….

"You could have avoided that." Ciel stated, glaring at me. Good point. But good points don't work here buddy.

"Master, how unfortunate, they don't seem to have taken very good care of you…" That son of a bitch! He walked right past (literally) bloody me and towards the young lord.

"No! Stay back!" Vanel threatened.

"You look like a helpless little child all bound up like that." Sebastian mused, "but I guess that is appropriate."

"If you come any closer I will shot him and the maid!"

"Can we move this along?" Ciel said clearly bored. Vanel tightened his grip.

"Um, yeah I hate to point this little fact out but if he comes any closer the loony-tune might shoot you!" I stated obviously.

"What the hell is going on!?" Vanel shrieked in a state of panic.

Sebastian brought a finger to his face, his hair covering one eye. Okay damn he looked friggin hot. _FOCUS!_ Alex really?. "Master, you know what you have to do…" He tilted his head. "Just say the words…"

Ciel looked at the demon and opened his left eye. "This is an order." Although I had seen it many times I was still somewhat taken aback by the pentagram in his eye. "SAVE ME NOW!" The pentagram began to glow.

"NO IT'S OVER!" Vanel shouted. A gun fired, my scream filled the air. I knew what would happen but I was just a little jumpy.

Smoke came from the gun; it was still pointed at Ciel's head. He turned and glared at the Italian. "What? How? That's impossible for you to still be alive!" I almost feel sorry for him….JK no I don't!

"Are you looking for this?" Sebastian stood behind them holding the bullet in between his gloved fingers. "Let me give it back to you then." He dropped it into Vanel's front jacket pocket.

A pained cry suddenly came from the Italians lips. His arm was twisted in a sickly manner. "I think I might just throw up…" I said looking away . Sebastian picked up Ciel as if he was a doll.

"I must say, the game was not as fun this time Sebastian." Game… _game_… GAME! WAS THIS ALL A GODAMNED GAME TO HIM?

Vanel crawled forward. "Wait, come back! Work for me!" Ha, no c "Be my body guard and I will pay you ten times what he does! The girl too" It should've been evident we weren't listening as he set Ciel down on a plush chair. "Alright twenty times!" _Now_ I'm tempted to take that offer….

"You can have all the liquor-" ha! Sebastian doesn't drink! Or he maybe does. "-and women you want too!" Women… pig. Sebastian ripped the belt like it was a piece of thread. Hell, I can't even rip a piece of thread like that.

"I am sorry Mr. Vanel, it is an attractive offer-" I know he doesn't care."-but we have no interest in materialistic things…" Speak for yourself.

"You see… I am simply, one hell of a butler." His eyes glowed a intimidating pink (I never thought that type of pink existed) and his pupils reduced to cat like slits.

I guess I'm just gonna bleed to death here. _GOODBYE WORLD!_*Waves dramatic handkerchief*

Black feathers began to fall around us. Just like the night I was transported into this world. I felt a bit of sympathy as the man's inevitable fate grew nearer. "As long as my master holds the contract I am his loyal servant."

Sebastian removed his gloved right hand with his teeth, I always found that incredibly sexy.

"A wish, a sacrifice, and this." He held up the Faustian Contract which was embedded on his hand. "All of these things keep me bound to Lord Phantomhive. Until the day I swallow his soul." That sounds really creepy in person.

"Unfortunately for you, this game is over." After a few moments Ciel had walked out of the room. What the hell was he planning now?

"It appears you are still bleeding Alex."

"And?"

"I shall have to fix that…" FML.

Everything became way too much for me, between today's events and my loss of blood I couldn't take it anymore.

I fainted.

**~CTO~**

"Master Ciel! You're injured!" Finny said worried.

"I just tripped and fell nothing serious." My eyes fluttered open and landed and the back of the Ci-Ci's (thought I forgot about that name?) head. "What? You don't believe what your master tells you?"

"Oh no, we do!" Mey-Rin said. I swear those guys are so stupid…. Who in their right mind would believe he only fell down stairs? Those stairs must be really gangster….

The servants directed their attention to me.

"Ah! Miss Alex! You look so cute, being held like a baby." I blushed at Finny's comment. A baby that will shove her adorable fist down your throat….

They continued to stare at me adoringly. It was really creepy. "Master," I felt Sebastian's chest rumble and I looked at him. My eyes must have been wide as saucers, I felt like a deer in head lights as I stared at him. "I am so terribly sorry, I have committed a blunder unfit for a Phantomhive servant. How could I ever atone? I hang my head in shame, for I have failed to prepare supper."

"Really dinner!? Are you serious!?" I yelled.

"Perhaps we should get you two healed first?"

"Naw, ya think?"

"Well, I suppose dinner could be postponed for a few hours more." I swear, If I could kill Sebastian (and if he wasn't incredibly hot) he'd be dead by now.

**Well here it is. How do you like the surprise? Please give feedback :)**


	12. That Otaku, Lollipop

**I'm sorry for not updating in a while, I just started high school. Lol the 7th was Freshman Friday and they were throwing pennies at the freshman. A penny landed right next to me and my friends at lunch. No one hit me though; I was looking at everybody like: "Throw a penny at me, I shoot your ass." XD **

**These are the things I learned at high school: **

**1.) The English teacher is SCARY.  
2.) The female gym teacher must really be bored with her job.  
3.) Upperclassmen point out freshman every chance they get (I THINK I KNOW I'M A FRESHMAN THANK YOU -_-)  
4.) There is a syllabus for EVERY class (and tons of homework in AP classes)  
5.) Some girls wear too little.  
6.) The mandarin teacher speaks rapid-fire Chinese during all classes.  
7.) The hallways are a stampede.**

**8.) The guys are _HOT!_**

**WARNING! This chapter may suck. If it does tell me.**

**ON WIT LE STOREH:**

**_Bold+Italics_= Alex's brain**

**Bold= Alex**

"GODAMNIT!"

"BITCH!"

"FUCKER!"

"Miss Lunamorte, such profanities won't lessen the pain."

"Well actually there was this study that said-"

"Miss, please _stay still_." That sounded like a demand more than a request.

I sat on the bed, in nothing but my underwear and a towel. It was hella embarrassing but I had to do it if I wanted my, bullet wound to be healed.

"Isn't here a quicker way!?" I yelled.

"Yes, but I believe you won't like it." Sebastian replied.

"JUST DO IT [Lol Nike moment]" I'm seriously gonna regret that decision.

"Are you certain?"

"Positive." _No, no, NO!_

Sebastian smirked at me, that somewhat mischievous look in his eyes. Oh god, what have I done?! He slowly leaned towards me, the smirk growing and his eyes glowing a swirling magenta. He then pushed me down on the bed and straddled my hips.

_**I knew you were gonna regret this! I TOLD YOUR ASS!**_

**Shut up.**

_**Oh yeah, I forgot you probably enjoying it.**_

**I'm not even going to dignify that with a response….**

After I got through with my head conversation (I'M NOT WEIRD, I'M UNIQUE!) Sebastian's face was closer to me. Before I even had time to react, his tongue shot out and licked the wound on my shoulder.

What ….

The ….

Hell ….

Just ….

Happened….?

"_DA FUQ DID YOU JUST DO, YOU PERVERTED DEMON SON OF A BITCH!?" _If he wasn't the hottest thing I ever set my eyes on, _I swear _he'd be **DEAD **by now.

**~CTO~**

_**Author's Pov:**_

"Have you found out what she is, Sebastian?" The little lord asked his butler while sipping his earl gray tea.

"Yes, My Lord, she has a witch's blood."

"And how exactly did you come to that conclusion?"

The demon could not lie to his young master, for he promised. So he only told the truth, "I licked her (that could be taken so many ways)."

"…..!" The boy's distaste was quite obvious; you couldn't tell weather his face was turning white, green, or red. Let's just end this by saying he looked somewhat like the Mexican flag.

**GOMEN NASAI! I'm so sorry for the short chapter T^T I am working on the next (much longer) chapter RIGHT NOW. Please give feedback, positive or negative. The links to art for this story are on my profile. Oh yeah, Can someone help me with how Alexandra will tell them that she's from the future? I want something unique. If you have any ideas (for that or anything else) don't be shy _PM ME!_**


	13. That Otaku, Motherly

**HERE I AM. Told you I would update soon. Three days is soon compared to how long it usually takes me right?**

"AAAAAHHHHH!"

"Grell! Slow the hell down!" I called after the brunette butler [A/N: That should totally be an anime] as he sped off on the tea cart carrying the tea (and cake of course) for Ciel and the guests. With how much I ran after Grell, you'd think I was training for a friggin marathon!

"I can't! Ah!"

I feel so sorry for the dude; he's such a screw up. I swear I'm the only person who cares enough to actually help him out. He broke through a door and a crash followed soon after. I ran into the room and saw that he had collided with finny. I would feel sorry for the boy, but the tray and the shy butler on top of it took allof the impact (I mean come on, this is _Finny_ were talking about).

I leaned against the wall trying hard to catch my breath, too bad, I think it's long gone. I hadn't run that hard since I set the library on fire in the seventh grade…

"Hot! Hot! Hot! Hot!" The gardener yelled repeatedly while pulling at his shirt and jumping around the room.

"Finny! Are you okay?" I asked.

"Oh I am so sorry!" Grell whimpered , "I will wipe it off!" Grell reached for a napkin but instead he ended up grabbing the table cloth pulling Ciel's meal to the cold floor.

"Grell stop it!" I tried to reach it but it was too late. The basket of bread clattered to the floor. Ciel sighed and (politely) facepalmed. "Damn it, that such a waste of food."

"Master…" I heard Bard whisper, "Why did you agree to take on such a useless idgit?"

"Hey!" I yelled as a tick mark appeared on my forehead, "Grell is so not useless!" I pulled the somewhat useless butler into my arms. While he cried I stroked his hair. "He is just inexperienced that's all. And I could say the same thing for you! You're the chef but you can't come within an inch of the kitchen without blowing it up!" I frowned at him. "Shh, it's okay babe; I won't let the violent chef hurt you." I whispered to Grell.

Ciel sighed, "Oh shut up all of you, it didn't seem like such a bad idea at the time." It never seems like a bad idea at the time….

_**Earlier that day:**_

"_Ciel darling, I have a problem. Grell is hopelessly incompetent." I love Grell but that's the understatement of the year. "Could you do me a teeny tiny favor and have Sebastian train him as a butler? Can't refuse your favorite aunt now can you?" She blew a kiss at him dramatically. _

"_Actually he can but-" Sebastian's death glare made me stop._

"I thought Sebastian would be the only one inconvenienced, I never predicted that I would be affected by it as well."

"THAT IS A MOTHERFUCKING LIE!" I screamed which startled everybody and most likely made Grell deaf. "I WAS THE ONE WATCHING HIM THE ENTIRE TIME! YOU PEOPLE AIN'T DO JACK!"

"Ho, ho, ho…" Do I even need to tell you who that came from at this point? I do wonder what he was actually saying though….

Grell seemed to shrink as the three servants and I glared at him. "I am so sorry for causing all this trouble… I simply don't know how I can apologize enough. Wait that's it! The only thing I can do now is die! I shall atone with my death!" Oh here we go again. He pulled out a knife, wait, where the hell was he keeping that? "I shall atone with my death!" He pointed it at his throat. He really has a thing for death doesn't he? Irony has it's ways…

"Whoa! Calm down a second!" Bard yelled.

"Umm, Should we take the knife away?" Mey-Rin asked nervously.

"There is no need for that, " Sebastian said with a smile on his face as Grell turned around. Aww he must be sweet after all…. That is until he opens up his mouth again. "Just think of the horrible mess you would make. It'd take hours to clean up all of the blood." WHAT THE- Seriously!? He wants to commit suicide and all your worried about is cleaning up after him?! I would be too…BUT THAT'S BESIDES THE POINT!

The 'incompetent' butler groveled on his knees at Sebastian's feet. "Thank you, Sebastian. You're so very kind."

"That was kind?" I asked. The servants shook their heads furiously, answering to my question.

"No what I'd like to know," Oh lord here we go. Sebastian (much to my disappointment) continued, picking up the teapot and a new box of tea. "Is how you could ever think it was acceptable to serve the master such weak tea."

"HA! You should taste the tea in America. If anything your tea is too strong." Sebastian wrinkled his nose in distaste at my remark and preceded to lecture Grell on the art of tea making. Talk about overdoing it…..

"Watch me, a spoonful for each person and one more for the pot. Finally add half-a-pint of boiling water and let it steep until done." The servants were furiously taking notes up until Sebastian finished and placed the steaming cup of tea in front of the Earl.

"Master, are you ready? It is almost time." Damn Ciel didn't even get to take a good sip of his tea yet. "I have the carriage waiting for you in the front drive."

"Fine," Ciel said nonchalantly.

Well, I guess when adventure calls….you must answer.

"As for the rest of you," Sebastian turned towards the three trouble makers as I made my way over to bug Ciel. "I want this place absolutely spotless, understand?" Oh Sebby love, why must you ask for the impossible?

"Grell, I think you should just chill until we get back. I don't think anyone wants another accident." I said to Grell who was currently sitting in the corner on his knees next to the fallen tea cart and broken plates. Poor thing, he looks so sad…. "And if you want to kill yourself again, do it outside, Sebastian would really 'preciate it 'kay?" I said in a cheerier voice. The sad thing is, his face actually brightened.

"What generosity, what great kindness!" I swear this guy has some serious issues.

**~CTO~**

Ciel, Sebastian, and I walked into a cane shop as the news paper boy's voice died out while the door closed.

"Oh, hello boy. Did your father send you for something?" The old man at the front desk inquired. What the fudge, does this guy even read?

"Umm, yeah hi," I chirped sarcastically in my dumb blonde voice. "Were actually here to pick this up." I snatched the paper from Sebastian's pocket and handed it to the slow person.

"Ohhh, you're here for the walking stick. I was wondering who would have a use for one as short as this." I wonder how much time his wife (if he even has one) has put him out on the couch for his mouth. Does he even think first? He just continued on like an idiot. "Naturally, I didn't think a child-" The old man stopped in his tracks as Sebastian shoved the stick towards the man's face, stopping just before it hit him.

"Straight as an arrow, a magnificent stick indeed sir." Sebastian said, the infamous smirk evident on his (SEXAAAAY~) face. The old man's face was absolutely _PRICELESS_.

I threw the bag of coins on the desk as we began to leave "Keep the change, biyotch!" I yelled.

Ciel completely ignored my disrespectful outburst and began to speak while we walked through the busy streets.

"That ridiculous strength of Finny's is a menace. How could someone accidentally break a walking stick." I broke my grandma's while trying to use it as a pole vault but I don't think that classifies as an accident…. "It's a pain to specially order a new one."

"Certainly, what a pity to go through all that trouble when you probably haven grown since you were seven…"

"I have too!" Ciel yelled while blushing an angry red.

"Don't lie to yourself."

"Says the 18 year old girl who only began to develop last year and isn't even married."

"AT LEAST I GREW. AND SO WHAT? I'M TOO YOUNG TO GET MARRIED ANYWAY!" Ciel smirked, knowing that he had took a low blow.

"Wow, the argument wasn't as entertaining as I had wished."

"OH I'LL SHOW YOUR ASS ENTERTAINING!"

"Please keep it down, you'll make a fool out of yourself."

I looked around and noticed all of the people staring at me. "You are _SO _Lucky that you're cute or else."

**~CTO~**

When the carriage pulled up to the mansion I forcefully threw open the doors and stepped out.

"Ahhhhh, I can just breathe in this fresh air forever!"

"Why Miss Alexandra, If I didn't know any better I'd think you were trying to harm me."

I gasped dramatically "I would _never_! What ever made you come to this conclusion?"

Sebastian only smirked before waiting for Ciel to step out and walking up the drive way.

"I'm sure you're tired master, I'll prepare tea for you immediately" Sebastian opened the front door only for us to find the manor decorated from head to toe in ribbons, jewels, and other extremely girly things. Needless to say, my face completely mirrored Ciel's, which was a mixture of disgust and absolute terror.

"My mansion….!" Poor Ci-Ci.

"What happened to this place?" Sebastian asked in astonishment.

"It's a fucking disaster." I'm scarred for life now.

Just then the three servants came running from out of nowhere and attached themselves to my Sebby. Well, probably not nowhere. I just didn't care enough to pay close attention. Now what we need to focus on is their outfits! Well not Mey-Rin though, she just saw the opportunity and took it. Bard had on a ruffled bonnet with baby-blue ribbon and Finny had the _MOST ADORABLE _bunny ears ever! I don't know weather to die of laughter or adorableness….

"What is going on here, and why are you all dressed like lunatics?" Sebastian is annoyed.

"Sebastian! She's _crazy_!" Bard cried. _Oh no_...

"Who is crazy?" Ciel asked the frightened servants. _It can't be_...

We heard weird gurgling noises in the next room and went to check only to see Grell hanging from the ceiling by s sting with a bow around his neck and another on his head.

"Da Fuq are you doing." I asked deadpanning.

"I believe I'm in the process of dying Miss Alex." O rlly? How, like, totally logical!

"Get him down Sebastian."

"Yes sir."

As Sebastian walked over to untie Grell, a flash of orange and ruffles darted by, creating an abrupt breeze.

"CIEEEELLLL ~!" _Oh my fucking god IT IS HER! ELIZABETH, SHIT I CAN'T RUN NOW!_

"Ciel, you're back! I missed you so much!" She glomps Ciel.

"Elizabeth, what a surprise!" He sounds hella scared, he should be.

"How many times do I have to tell you!? Call me Lizzy! _Oh_, you really are just the cutest thing ever aren't you just a darling boy I could just eat you up!" God I hate her voice…. She talks so much.

"Lady Elizabeth," Sebastian stepped in holding Grell by his collar and saving Ciel from his never ending torture.

"Oh hello Sebastian, how are you?" She said curtsying. "Aww, you took him down?" What the- This chic _is _crazy.

"Yes, he detracted from the beauty of the room." A BUCKET FULL OF LIES! It was obvious to everyone but Lizzy that he just lied.

She whined "But I made such a lovely decoration out of him!"

"A…decoration?" Whoa even Sebastian is baffled by her. Oh how I wish I had my camera.

"Just look at it all," She exclaimed with her arms out wide. "Isn't the salon so beautiful now?"

"Ugh my mansion. It's so…..pink." I feel your pain Ciel, I feel it.

"From now on only the cutest things belong in the Phantomhive Manor! Right Antoinette?" We all turned and looked at Tanaka. I tried my hardest to keep a straight face.

"Sebastian, don't worry! I have something for you too!" She pulled out a bonnet from god-knows-where and placed it on Sebastian's head.

Sebastian was in a god damn pink. Bonnet. No joke.

"Well, Sebastian… pink really does suite you; it's quite nice to see you in a different color besides black." I said with my best poker face. If she wasn't practically engaged to Ciel Elizabeth would be dead by now. And so would I for that comment.

"I agree Alexandra! He looks so much cuter now!"

I walked over to Sebastian and Grell, "So who is this girl anyway Sebastian?" I Bard asked.

"She is the daughter of the Marquis of Scotten. She is the Young Master's betrothed."

"His Fiancé of course," Grell stated. And then it hit them.

"FIANCE?" They all shouted (except for Sebastian and I).

"But of course, Lady Elizabeth is born into nobility, nobles marry other nobles. That is how it has been." Sebastian stated as if it was really just that simple.

"I have an idea!" Lizzy stated, "Since the manor is decorated so prettily why don't we have a ball to night?" I don't really think I'm much of a ball person. She grabbed Ciel's wrist and spun him around. "You can be my escort and we can dance all night long isn't that a wonderful idea?" No.

"A ball? No!" Ci-Ci, you took the words straight from my mouth.

"You will wear the clothes I picked out for you right?" Oh dear god, she must be on crack, and not the good kind. "Pretty please they would be so cute on you! Of course I will be dressed for the night as well! You two come with me! I will make you cuter than you already are!" She grabbed the rope around Grell's neck and my wrist and drags us out of the room. I felt sorry for Grell however, he was being effectively choked.

**~CTO~**

I managed to convince Lizzy to let me go. I only had to say a few words of encouragement and she just backed off.

Grell's dress was really pretty though! Yes, Grell was in a dress. But that's beside the point.

**~CTO~**

After changing like the ninja I am and dealing with a terrified (don't ask why _MWAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA)_ Elizabeth I walked down stairs. Actually, more like fell. When I had laid eyes on Bard, Finny and Tanaka I lost it. I had laughed so hard I slipped and fell down the last few stairs. Bard was in an orange wig and pink Sailors outfit, Tanaka was in a Japanese princess outfit. Well that's what it looked like anyway. Then Finny…

Finny… oh my fucking god… he was in a black cat's nurse outfit. Yes, cat nurse. Those are the only words I can use to describe it. I snapped back to reality when Grell went all dramatic on our asses.

"If I had to pick a dress it would have been in a sexy shade of red with a waist line that would flatter my figure." Grell. I love you. So. Much.

"Really! That's your problem wif it?" Bard said.

Grell looked at all of us. "I can't live with a shade as bad as this!" He ran over and opened a window. I didn't stop him though; I honestly gave up on him and his suicidal tendencies. Plus I knew he wouldn't do it anyway. He looked back at all of us again, "You aren't going to try and stop me this time?" We all deadpanned.

We all looked over when Mey-Rin started to flip out, "I am really far sighted my lady! Can't see a thing without my glasses!" Liar. She can shoot a fly from twenty miles away.

"Well you don't need to see at a ball to have fun!" With that Lizzy continued her attempt (RAPE) to get the glasses.

"Leave her alone." Ciel commanded.

"Ciel! You look adorable!" She tackle hugged him. OMFG HE DID LOOK ADORABLE! However the air seemed to darken when she saw the ring on his thumb,

"Ciel… why aren't you wearing the ring I bought you. It matches your outfit perfectly now where did it go?" Damn she can be scary.

"The ring my lord has on already goes with it my lady." I stated cautiously, Lizzy turned on me and flipped out.

"NO! I WENT TO SO MUCH TROUBLE AND THAT RING ISN'T CUTE AT ALL! WHY WON'T YOU WEAR THE RING I PICKED OUT FOR YOU! I JUST WANT EVERYTHING TO BE PERFECT YOU ARE SO CRUEL!" Well damn! Honestly she is acting like it's the end of the world.

"Lizzy that isn't it, this ring-"

"Ha! Fooled you!" Oh no. No this part. She lunged at Ciel and took the ring off of his thumb. Shit… this is so not good. "It's mine now!" She held it up triumphantly.

"Lizzy…" Ciel said in a dangerous tone.

"This one is far too big for you! The one I bought will fit perfectly. Just put it on-"

"GIVE IT BACK." Lizzy flinched. Ciel held out his hand, all emotion gone. We all stared at him, "Give me that ring now Elizabeth."

"Why are you so angry at me?" Ciel's eye narrowed, "I just wanted to make everything look adorable that's all…" She was on the verge of tears, as much as I found her annoying I just felt sorry for her at this point. "Why are you so angry at me? I hate this stupid ring! Take it!" She brought it up and flung it towards the ground. A shattering sound filled the room.

Ciel stiffened, pure hatred in his eyes, he ran forward and brought his hand up. "NO CIEL!" I cried running forward and pulling Lizzy into a protective embrace. The sound of flesh hitting flesh rang in my ears as I felt a stinging on my cheek. I looked up and saw Ciel looking at me with apologetic eyes.

Lizzy was shaking against me. Sebastian walked forward and placed a hand over his heart, "Forgive my master Lady Elizabeth but that ring was something important to him. It's a precious heirloom passed down to each head of the Phantomhive Family. He has grown attached to it; it's truly one of a kind. Please try to understand as to why this upset him." And totally ignore the girl who just got the bejeezus slapped out of her…

"It, it was that important to him? I destroyed it?"

"Please don't blame yourself Lady Liz…" I said softly, "You wouldn't have known…" I bent down and picked up the ring placing it in the pocket on my skirt. "Over time it would have broken anyway, as all things do eventually."

"Even without it, I am still head of the Phantomhives. Some silly ring won't change that." Ciel stated. I smiled sadly; he could act so strong if it meant fooling people into believing something. On the inside though, he was just a child. He walked over to Lizzy, "How long are you going to cry?" He pulled out a handkerchief, "Your face is a mess, completely unsuitable for a lady." And number one on the list of things never to say to your fiancé we have….. "How could I possibly ask a lady with a runny nose and poufy eyes to dance?" Number two…

Everybody's ears however were suddenly captured by the beautiful sounds only a violin could produce. We all looked to the source of it all and found Sebastian playing the captivating music. "He's incredible." I heard Mey-Rin whisper.

"He's a show-off," I mumbled, knowing Sebastian could hear me.

Grell suddenly had a moment of inspiration and ran over and started to sing along with the magical strings.

We all dead panned, "What the 'ell?'e can actually sing!" Bard yelled.

"So are we agreed? We shall forget our troubles and dance the night away?" Lizzy took the hand Ciel offered and they spun into a waltz.

Hours later we were all outside the manor as Lizzy lay asleep in the carriage. "Don't worry," Grell said confidently. "I will make sure she gets home safely. You can count on me."

He walked over and took Sebastian's hands, honestly it was kinda funny. Grell was so full of emotion and Sebastian looked like he wanted to punch the crap out of somebody. "Thank you so much Sebastian, I am in your debt. You have taught me a lot about what it means to be a butler. They say before a person dies his life flashes before him." Really? Back on the whole death subject are we? "I know that when I see the light of death, this momentous evening will be the one to appear in my dying vision."

"Huh, interesting that you would say that…" Yes very 'interesting'.

"That's true; he hasn't been very good at dying so far has he?" Mey-Rin commented.

"Ho, ho, ho…"

I waved as the carriage went off into the distance, I heard Ciel give a weary sigh and say, "It's finally over… What a horrible day it has been."

I walked into Ciel's bedroom as he lay in bed, "O rlly? I thought it was lyk totally awesum." He stared at me like I had grown two heads. "I was joking dude…"

"Don't be so foolish Alex…" He brought a hand to his thumb but seemed startled to find that the ring was missing.

"Is she the fool here?" Sebastian asked from the window as he shut the curtains.

"Lady Liz smashed it remember Ciel?" I bent down and took his hand, "We all know the importance of this ring." I slid the blue gem onto his thumb. "However you put on that obvious act for her…" I brought my hand away.

Ciel stared at me in shock. "If Sebastian couldn't do that much… well what kind of butler would he be?" I murmured smirking. "However you should take care of it… this ring is very precious. It has seen so much that one can only wonder what secrets it holds."

"That's true… it is always there… it has seen the death of many masters. My grandfather, my father, and eventually it will witness my own death." I took off his eye patch and placed it on the night stand next to him. "It has heard the dying screams of many for generation upon generation. I close my eyes and I hear them too…" He held is head, grabbing at his hair. He looked so weak and pathetic like this. I couldn't stand it.

"If I throw the ring away I won't have to listen to the screaming anymore. At least that is what I believed." I picked up the candelabra as he continued, "Hmph, ridiculous yes."

I smiled "No, I don't think so."

"My, look how high the moon has risen… you must get some rest sir." Sebastian said as he tucked Ciel in. "You wouldn't want to make yourself ill do you?" We began to leave when Ciel said something.

"Sebastian, stay by my side… until I fall asleep."

"Goodness young master. Are you displaying weakness in front of us now?" Jackass…

He shifted, "It is just a simple order…"

I heard a small laugh escape Sebastian's lips. He walked over a knelt down. "I will stay here, I am by your side forever master." Until the day you devour his soul….

"G'night Ciel." I said as I began to exit the room.

"Wait….Alex?"

"Yeah shorty?"

He ignored my comment and continues shyly with a slight pink tint coloring his cheeks, "I'm sorry…..for hitting you."

I laughed and tilted my head like I didn't really care about what happened (and like the bruise wasn't there)

"It's fine. I'm okay." I closed the door behind me, leaving behind the day as well.

**I'm done! I would've finished the chapter the day I posted the last one but, I went over my best friend's house. I haven't been able to see her as much since we graduated. I spent the night there. Then I went to her grandma's house for her sister's sleepover. And yesterday we went to a football game. THE MOST EMBARRASING THING HAPPENED:**

**After the game was over me and Dazha my best friend (pronounced day-ja) helped out with carrying the band's instruments and stuff. Before I continue, let me just say that we were at St. Rita an _all boys _school. Dazha's sister Brychell (like Michelle with a Br-) told us to put away her flute in the band room. (even though it's all boys girls still help with events) We went into the bad room and when we went in there all of the boys were shouting "GIRLS! GIRLS!" but I just thought that it was normal for them because even if someone's ugly they'll still be like "Oh my god, a female!" So we were just focused on getting the flute apart and in the case which is surprisingly hard. Next thing we know a guy was like "Girls, were getting naked!" So of course me and my friend looked up (who do you know that wouldn't if _anyone _randomly yelled that) and was like OMFG THEY'RE GETTING UNDRESSED. What Dazha's sister failed to tell us was that the band guys (who are friggin hot and) are in the room getting dressed after the games end. We had to take the walk of shame out of the huge room and down the equally huge hallway.**

**Has something like that ever happened to you guys?**

**P.S. sorry for the long authors notes. I want to know more about you guys (and want you to know as much about me as possible)**


	14. That Otaku, FanGirling

**Hi….**

I sat across from Ciel in the carriage, studying is face like the creeper I am as he glared at a letter. Well I think he was glaring I wasn't sure because his face was half hidden by his hat. Big Ben chimed in the distance followed by the sound of clacking horse hooves.

"

Ciel…" I began breaking the awkward silence, "the letter ain't gonna open itself." I said slowly, he looked up and narrowed his eye at me.

"I am aware…"

I put my hands up, "I was just making sure…" I felt the carriage turn and go into an arc like shape then it stopped. I hopped out of the carriage followed by Ciel. "Ah~, Fresh air," I spun around in a circle with my arms spread wide towards the sky.

"If you can stop messing around Alexandra we have important work to do." Ciel said walking around me.

"I hate it here; there are too many people around…" I heard Ciel grumble…

"Anti-social much? I swear when you get older you'll have half of Brittan's cat population." I said snickering.

"I am allergic to cats." Ha, I bet Sebastian is just _surrounded_ in sparkles at the thought of all those cats though…

"Well fine, how about the dog population?" I said slinging an arm over his shoulder and fanning my hand out in front of us like I was advertising something. "Besides if you are always stuck up in that manor you are sure to go hella insane before you even hit old age!"

_**If he does.**_

**Shut up.**

_**I'm just saying.**_

**Nobody asked you.**

"Alexandra is right my lord, it is tradition for nobility to travel between town and country between seasons my lord."

"It's only a waste of time if you ask me…" Ciel murmured as we walked up one of the many staircases I'm pretty sure this place had.

"Look on the bright side. At least we can enjoy some peace and quiet!"

"That does sound nice…"

"Oh. My. God. Did Ciel just agree with me? _IT'S THE END OF THE WORLD_!"

"Nevermind, I don't think there'll be much quiet with you here."

"Love you too, bro."

We walked to the front door and Sebastian opened it. When we walked in everything was turned over, all the books scattered, sheets rumpled and scattered. Vases one their sides, one lamp even had its shade on upside down! Madam Red at a book shelf throwing them behind her in a frenzy.

"Goodness where do they keep the tea in here?" I heard her say. Yes because tea would totally be on a bookshelf. I turned my attention to Lau who sat on the floor looking into a vase; I wonder how long he'd been staring into that.

"I cannot seem to find them either." The Chinese man sighed. Maybe he thought they would magically appear in there…

"Don't be silly of course it isn't in there!" She said frustrated. Ciel was about to say something when I spotted him. Searching through a cabinet on the floor was the one and only…

"GRELL!" I stampeded forward vaulting over the couch and enveloping the brunette into a bone crushing hug, "Oh, 'sup Madam Red and Lau!" I said waving as I continued to strangle hug Grell.

"May I inquire as to why you are here?"

"Oh, you three are early." Says the person that broke in.

"Your sudden appearance in town must mean-" Lau hummed. I seriously don't see how Lau cold always be so high. Doesn't he get tired of it _sometime_?!

"-the queens guard dog has a new sent to follow." Madam Red finished. Icwudt* Madam. I glanced at Ciel and saw that he wasn't amused by her comment. Or it could have been their presence, and knowing Ciel it was most likely that. After we all got situated and I was stuck behind Ciel's chair leaning against the wall in the greatest discomfort ever.

"So why are you here?" Madam Red questioned. I could ask the same for you.

"He has struck again… another prostitute was found gruesomely murdered in white chapel."

"These killing are far from normal…" Ciel continued, "The level of violence we are seeing is unprecedented."

I shifted my position trying to become more comfortable but it was highly unlikely. Sebastian started talking, "The most recent victim was a woman named Mary Ann Nichols."

"It also seems that a special type of blade was used on her…" I added not wanting to look incompetent. "She was torn up beyond recognition I hear." I was staring at the floor with a sort of strange smile on my face, I could feel it. The lights were on for me but I wasn't home. "This murderer's distinct killing style has earned him a unique nickname." I think I hang around Sebby too muck because I was loving this….

"Jack the Ripper." Ciel continued, completing the eerie feel I began to create.

"A frightening name eh?" Lau asked, well duh.

"Yes, that is why we are here earlier than expected. I wanted to look at the situation for myself." Ciel stated in his same monotone.

Lau set down his cup and smirked, you know, I get an extremely rapist-y feeling from him. "Are you sure that you will be able to stomach the scene when the time arises little lord?"

"What do you mean Lau…"

"The sight of the dismembered body will certainly be horrific." My stomach started to churn as my mind started picturing things again. If I tried hard enough I could have sworn I smelled the coppery scent of a person's blood. "Then one can only imagine the stench," Lau said as he stood and walked over to Ciel. PEDO ALERT! "Blood and gore, everywhere."

"Are you _trying _to scare the crap out of people?!" I yelled with a tick mark appearing on the side of my head.

"Why, is My Lady becoming scared?" Lau questioned. The creepy smile still on his face.

"Nope not at all…." I lied.

"As I was saying, there is more than enough to drive even the bravest of men mad, are you prepared to see what awaits us?"

Lau bent down and pinched Ciel's cheek, my feet were wobbly, and I didn't know how much longer I could stand. I felt myself starting to slip, my skirt gathering up in the back against the wall. However Sebastian decided to take pity on me and helped me back up, holding me too him as tried to stay sane. Blood, intestines, organs, decaying flesh, body eating insects devouring at some unrecognizable body filled my mind. I could almost hear the woman screaming. However I didn't want to focus on that, not wanting those things to fill my head my eyes darted around the room. They landed on Grell.

I didn't realize Ciel and Lau had continued talking, what I did notice however was how silent Madam Red had been, don't you just wonder why? Ahh, beautiful sarcasm.

**~CTO~**

Me, Sebastian and Ciel walked up to Abberline, the adorable detective (what he's not adorable to you too?).

"We are here to see the body kind sir." I stated.

"The body? Surely you're kidding me!" He said taken aback.

"Abberline!" A voice called Arthur Randall I believe. God this dude annoyed me throughout the entire series. I just loved it when Ciel always pwned him though. "Well if it isn't Lord _Phantomhive_, what are you doing here?"

"You know this child sir?"

"I am here to help Sir Arthur; it seems the investigation is dragging as of late." I held up the Queens letter filed with our orders. "You know who it was sent from of course." The gasped at the seal and were startled slightly when Ciel ripped the papers form Abberline's hands. "It seems that you haven't found any major clues yet."

Sir Arthur ripped the papers back, "We at Scotland Yard are more than capable of handling this case I assure you. There is no need for you to interfere."

"Well clearly you don't because otherwise you would be farther along. We then wouldn't have been called in to help pick up the pace of this investigation." I said yawning. I saw Sir Arthur's hand clench tightly at wanting to slap me for my remark. However with people around he couldn't do just that.

Ciel, on the other hand, smirked, "Splendid, let's go you two."

"Yes sir," Sebastian said his first words in going on an hour.

"Now what dear?" Madam Red asked, Lau and Grell in tow.

"Now we find somebody who actually may be of use to me." FUCK YES! UNDERTAKER TIME! Finally the day has come…. Cue the sparkles and rosy background.

This remark however shocked Lau to his very core, or at least that is my guess based on his reaction. "My lord! You don't mean!"

"Yes, indeed."

**~CTO~**

A little while later we found ourselves in front of a large shop. It gave of a feeling of death. Then again dead people came here so it only seems fitting. "So…" Lau began. "Where are we?"

"YOU DON'T KNOW? THEN WHAT WAS ALL THAT ABOUT!" Madam Red shouted. Well he is Lau smart person, he most likely did it because he is a creeper.

"It is a funeral parlor run by a friend of my lord." Sebastian stated. YES! YES! YES!

"Why here though?" I asked faking calmness.

"If we are looking for answers this is the place." Ciel said as we walked in. It was pitch black in there but you could make out a few things such as coffins, Yes, coffins. They scattered the floor, some stood up straight against walls as if a vampire was going to come out. In the back I could make out a skeleton figure. An old candle chandelier hung from the ceiling. It gave chills…Good ones [Can't you just see her otaku-ness now?].

An extremely familiar voice rang out in the darkness making me jump from the sudden appearance of it. "Hehehe~" The voice cackled, "Welcome, I thought I would be seeing you before long." A coffin started to shake and the lid slid away slightly. I think I just died and went to heaven. Now all I have left on my bucket list is to look under those bangs…

A hand with extremely long black painted nails crept out and latched onto the coffin lid, pushing it away more to reveal the person inside. Do I even need to describe him? His face made an appearance, "My lord it is so lovely to see you… and it seems you have a new creature here."

I had the sudden desire to run up and hug him.

**You guys, I really want to practice doing one-shots for some reason so if you want me to write about something please request it. And for all that is holy NO SMUT!**


	15. That Otaku, Super Fan-Girl

**It's been a while since I updated so you'll probably have to read the last chapter again before this…**

And that's what I did. After trying to beat down my inner fan girl and suppress the urge to strangle hug Undertaker (which was hella hard) I just couldn't take it anymore. Everyone else gave me weird looks when I tackled the white-haired man and began nuzzling his face.A wild fuck appeared, I used dodge. Fuck was not given. I was in the presence of mother. Fucking. UNDERTAKER! I could care less what everyone thought. This guy is _the_ shit in my book and millions of other's I'm pretty sure! He is so awesome, and his voice. Oh god, HIS VOICE IN GOD DAMN REAL LIFE IS _THE_ GREATEST THING, like, EVER. It's not all deep and super sexy like Sebastian's voice but it just has that tone to it that really adds to the crazy person he acts like. And to me, crazy people are sexy (I hope you don't think Sebby is normal).

"That's actually not why we're here," I said my voice and strangled whisper as I tried to keep it from a high pitched shriek.

"Oh I know, you see witch-" Undertaker began, bringing his hands together.

"Why does he call her witch…?" I heard Lau mumble.

"-My last few customers have been a bit unusual, I helped however, I made them look beautiful once more." He had brought his hands up to his face as if in a dreamlike state, you know how in a class room when you are so~ with bored your head is in your hands? Kinda like that but not really…..more fan-girly.

"Oh I see," Lau began, "The funeral parlor is only your cover business, and how much is it for information." Or he just really loves being around dead people….

Suddenly the Undertaker was in front of Lau and taking like a mad man… well then again he kinda was. "I have no need for the queen's coin! There is only one thing I want from you!" He turned to Ciel, naturally being the loving older sister that I am I pulled him to me quickly. As much as I love this crack pot he just goes a little overboard. This didn't faze the gray haired man however, "Please my lord," he begged, "Give it to me and I shall tell you anything you desire!" Dude…..Give _what?!_ "Give me the extraordinary gift of true laughter!" Undertaker's arms had been spread out wide when he suddenly wrapped himself in an effective hug.

That settles it, this man has drugs somewhere. Maybe that barrel of white stuff he has was crack….. The psycho just stood there squirming about in his self-embrace. I can't say I haven't done that before though…

"Allow me my lord," Lau started causing us all to look at him, 'It is a classic." He took a dramatic pose as I took out a flash light and shined the light on him. Don't ask me how I had one I just did. All our expressions showed great boredom and nonchalance. "On which side does the tiger have the most stripes?" Insert 3 second pause here… "On the outside!" Bad dum tst!

Oh I see what you did there Lau. "Boo…" I started when Sebastian clapped a hand over my mouth cutting me off. I licked his hand to see if I could get a reaction, I immediately regretted it when I tasted the material on which his glove was made of. That shit is gross. Man, I swear I never think these things through.

"My turn…" Madam read stated walking forward, "I live for gossip. So that means this story will make you laugh so hard you will simply curl up and die." Oh hell no. Ci-Ci was not gonna hear this. Before she began her dreadful tale I slapped my hands over Ciel's ears which may or may not have startled him and caused a ringing in his ears. "So Alice's boo gave her the most extraordinary *** for her birthday, it was a *** white and so *** *** with thick veins running *** don't you see *** you could use-" Not even _my_ ears could take this…

"ENOUGH!" I shouted surprising even Sebastian himself. A few minutes later Madam Red and Lau stood to the sidelines with a surgeons mask over their mouth covered by a giant red X. I stood next to them glaring.

"Now my lord it looks as though you are the only one left," Undertaker stated, his hands folded neatly. "I gave you a special discount this time but I am not gonna do it again." Ciel sighed angrily as I continued my death stare contest thing.

"I suppose it can't be helped," Sebastian sighed as he walked forward, I stared at him dumbstruck. Wait, wait, wait, did he have something this entire time?! "Everyone please wait outside." He said adjusting his gloves, "No matter what happens do not attempt to listen to this." He glared back at all of this.

"But I don't wanna…" I stated looking at him with big childish eyes. I pictured one of those scenes where the little kid has one of those weird chibi faces with dots for eyes and puckered lips (like this =3= but with dots). "You can't make me leave either," We stared at each other for a few moments before I was suddenly being strangled. Grell, you suck…

Moments later I stood with the others outside with my ear pressed up against the door. Let me tell you, I heard absolutely nothing….

A booming laughter soon came from inside at which I am sure my counterparts where sweat dropping as where I had let out a silent shriek and had gone flailing back into Lau when the sign started to break. I'm pretty damn sure he didn't mind. Sebastian opened the door with that closed eyed smile that I really wanted to punch off his face at the moment. "Please do come back in now, I believe he will tell us everything we need." If he had done that before we wouldn't have wasted so much time.

We walked back in and there was Undertaker… twitching on a coffin, still giggling. I looked at Sebastian and I backed away, ever so casually. Which is code for I almost fell over like 15 friggin coffins.

**~CTO~**

Once we had all gotten situated with beakers full of something (has this guy ever heard of lab safety?) and cozy coffins to sit on Undertaker began to tell us all he knew. "An interesting pattern I have seen these days…" He started, "I often get customers who are incomplete."

"How so?" I asked looking at the man before me. He sat there hugging an autonomy doll.

"Yes, the uterus is missing, which is quite odd." No really!? I thought that was completely normal….. Not every day somebody is missing something. "The killer makes a big mess of the body, but that particular part is always precisely excised." He said cleaning the dolls face, how could he act like he was stating the weather! Oh wait, this is Undertaker… be calm Alex.

"He did it on a road that was public though now high trafficked. Wouldn't an amateur have difficulty doing the job quickly enough?" They're not amateurs of course.

"You're a clever one… butler. That is exactly what I was thinking…" He walked over to me and made me stand, "Come now witch…" He said, he spun me and I stopped directly in front of him, facing them all. I am pretty sure I looked the part by the way they all slightly backed away. "You see he slits her throat with a sharp weapon." He dragged his nails across my throat, his hand was kinda cold. "Then," His other hand lowered to my stomach area. "He rips her right here, and takes her precious womanly parts."

He poked my cheek with his nail. He led me back to me seat and I sat down, he began to stroke my head. What the fuck dude? That is just plain creepy, but awesome nonetheless….. "There will be more slain I am certain. Sadistic killers like him don't stop until somebody makes him. Can you stop him? Will you sniff him out? Like a good little guard dog…" Undertaker cackled.

"My lord is bound by the honor of his family, he is to eliminate any threat the queen asks him to," I looked at them all with a small smile, "by any means he finds necessary. With all of us that shouldn't be too hard."

**~CTO~**

"With this new information it narrows down our suspects, first we must look at those with the necessary skills, and crossing out anybody with an alibi of the night in question. With the particular organ being taken it suggest some kind of gruesome ritual. This means we should concentrate our investigation on people dealing with secret societies." I stated one of the many lines I memorized.

"As if that narrows the field Alex?" Madam Red yelled, "Why even I would have the medical skills necessary for this!" Of course you would dear Madam….

"Well that just makes you one of our suspects now doesn't it?" I said as if explaining a simple math problem to a five year old.

She ignored me, "Besides the season is ending soon, any doctor that follows the nobles to the cities will be returning to the country soon then what?" God I wanted to punch her god damn face in.

I was about to shout at her when Sebastian butted in, "Then we will have to conclude this investigation quickly. I should be able to do this much at least. Otherwise what kind of butler would I be?"

"A normal one, duh." Everyone ignored that while Sebastian gave me a death glare.

Madam Red and Lau stared dumbstruck and Ciel just smirked. "Let me guess. You are going to make up a list of viable suspects and begin questioning them immediately?" I said with fake enthusiasm earning me another glare.

He opened the carriage door, "Now if you will excuse me…" And with that the demon butler was gone. I had to bite my hand when I saw the others' faces.

"HE KNOWS THAT WE'RE MOVING RIGHT?" Madam Red practically yelled in my ear.

"Well of course he does madam, but this is Sebastian we are talking about. If he didn't do something to prove how awesome he was at least once or twice a day then what kind of butler would he be?" I said smiling.

"Sebastian can take care of it; we can head home and have a cup of tea while we wait." Ciel said ignoring me again.

"YOU KNOW WHEN YOU IGNORE ME IT IS RATHER HURTFUL!" I yelled while flailing my arms, the adorable bastard only smirked.

**~CTO~**

Walking up the front stairs of the town home I opened the front door unsurprised to find A bundle of tall, dark, and sexy standing there waiting for us. "Welcome back everyone, I have awaited your return. The tea is ready for you in the drawing room." He said taking Ciel's hat.

"Have enough time to clean Sebastian?" I teased him getting me another glare. How many times was that today? It finally clicked for Madam Red.

"Hold on! How are you here!?"

"I finished that little errand so I made my way home."

"You made the suspect list already?"

"Well, yes I made a list of names based on the things we had discussed and contacted them all to ask the relevant questions." He stated motioning to the three scrolls he held.

"Come now Sebastian, that's impossible even for you."

"Here we go…" I hummed as a knife sliced the ribbon of the first scroll and he began to list off names and alibis. I, however, didn't give a fuck and tuned it all out. You know I am kinda hungry, I thought, some chicken would be nice… or even McDonald's, hell I could go for one of those weird ass biscuits Undertaker always has on him. Damn why didn't I get one of those to go? I always wanted to try one.

I looked around at all their faces; Lau's was of… well Lau. Madam Red's was of complete shock; her hat was falling off her head. I let out a small chuckle at this. Grell however was by far the best… it was pure motherfucking adoration. You would have thought he had been kissed by god himself (haha oh the irony). I swear I saw hearts around his head.

Sebastian dropped the last scroll onto the floor. "From this information I have narrowed down our lists to one possible suspect."

"Are you certain you're just a butler? Not a secret military intelligence officer?" Madam Red asked, oh come now Madam Red.

"See, my lady. I am simply one hell of a butler." I mouthed the words behind his back and later earned myself a slap to the back of the head.

**~CTO~**

Oh god, this is just too funny, seriously shoot me! The amount of fun I am having can't be legal. "Stop touching me Alex." Ciel snarled. Gosh he makes me sound all pervy….

"Oh seriously Ciel this is just too damn funny…" I said with a devious smile on.

"The Viscount Druitt…" Sebastian said pulling us all back to reality, I stared at him and had the sudden urge to punch him in his face to hear the satisfying crunch of his glasses breaking under my fist as he adjusted them for now reason. But damn he did look fine as hell with them on. "Also known as Aleister Chambers, he graduated from Medical School but has never gone into practice."

"Lately, he has thrown several parties at his home; behind the scenes of these things are secret gatherings that only intimates maintain." I finished.

"I heard he is into black magic and those occult sorts of things." Madam Red added.

"So your suspicion is that he is holding these parties to perform ritualistic sacrifices of local prostitutes?" Lau asked.

"Tonight is the last party of the season," Ciel said stepping out; I had to clamp my mouth shut at the sight of him. "Which means this was our last chance." Oh Ciel, why couldn't you have been born a girl? That dress and pigtail extensions look so nice on you. Oh, I guess I should fill you in.

That's right; Ciel is in _the_ legendary pink dress.

**You guys, I still really want to one-shots so if you want me to write about something _please_ request it. And for all that is holy NO SMUT! Sorry for the long wait T^T**


	16. I'M SORRY YOU GUYS! TT

**I'm sorry you guys, but I have a lot of revising to do for this story. So until I'm finished with that, Confessions of a Teenage Otaku will be on hiatus.**


	17. Prolonged Hiatus

**I'm really really **_**really**__**REALLY **_**sorry you guys….. I have been so busy lately and I won't be able to update for a while. I have papers due and AP exams coming up. I probably won't be able to update with the quality you guys deserve until the summer or on a random break. I am, once again, really sorry and I hope all of you will continue to follow this story and continue to support my writing until I can update.**


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